Al Yusra

The Doors of Success Have Been Closed for 6 Reasons

noreply@blogger.com (Relief) — Sat, 14 Nov 2009 03:38:00 +0000

Ibn ul Qayyim Al Jawziyah (Rahimahullah) mentioned in his monumental book
“Fawaa'id ul Fawaa'id” on the authority of Shaqeeq Ibn Ibrahim (Rahimahullah),

who said:The door of Tawfeeq (i.e. success) has been closed on the people because of six things:

The First: Because they (i.e. the people) busy themselves with the Ni'mah (i.e. blessing) bestowed upon them and
forget about the gratitude they should express to Allah, the One who bestowed the favor on them.

The Second: Because they have an ardent desire for knowledge however, they abandon acting upon it.

The Third: Because they hasten to commit sin but delay repentance for the sin.

The Fourth: Because they are deceived by the companionship of the righteous but fail to emulate their actions.

The Fifth: Because the life of this world is behind them but they are insistent on chasing after it.

The Sixth: Because the hereafter is in front of them but they turn away from it.

The source of all of this stems from a lack of Raja'a (i.e. hope in Allah's mercy) and Khowf (i.e. fear of Allah's
punishment and the fact that He may not accept any of your deeds). And the origin of this stems from a weakness in
Yaqeen (i.e. certainty). And the origin of this stems from a weakness in Baseerah (i.e. sound legislative knowledge).
And the origin of this stems from humiliation and ignobility and exchanging that which is superior for that which is
mediocre.

If the individual was noble and ambitious he would not settle for mediocre. The source of every good is by the Tawfeeq
(i.e. success) of Allah as well as by His will, the nobility of the soul, its magnanimity and exaltedness. Subsequently, the
source of every evil is the villainousness of the soul, its ignobility and lowliness, as Allah says:

قد أفلح من زكاها وقد خاب من دساها...
“Indeed he will be successful who purifies his soul and he who corrupts his own soul will fail…”

Meaning, the one who exalts his soul, multiplies it's good and nurtures it upon obedience to Allah, will be successful.
However, the one who disgraces his soul and humiliates it by exposing it to sin and disobedience to Allah will utterly
lose. Thus the noble souls are not satisfied except with the finer things in life, those things that reap the most
praiseworthy outcome. On the other hand, the ignoble souls loiter around the lowliest affairs just as the fly that only
lands on feces.

Hence the noble and superior soul is not satisfied with oppression, fornication/adultery, stealing or betrayal due to the
fact that he considers himself more dignified to commit such acts. However, the ignoble soul is the total opposite. And
every soul will incline towards what is in conformity with it’s desire(s) and what it deems suitable. This is consistent with
the statement of Allah:

قل كل يعمل على شاكلته
“Every soul shall act according to what it inclines towards…”

Meaning, every soul will act upon what is in conformity with it's desires. The soul will act upon what it deems suitable
and appropriate for it. Thus, every soul will proceed upon the path that is natural for it. So the Fajir (i.e. criminal) soul
will act according to what is natural for it, of welcoming the blessing(s) of Allah with sin while turning away from Al
Mun'im (i.e. The Giver of all bounty and blessing). Yet the believer acts according to what is natural for him, of gratitude
to Allah, the One who grants His bounty to whomsoever He wills. Also loving Him, praising Him, showing affection to
Him and being modest before Him, while the slave is conscious of the fact that Allah is evaluating his every movement,
coupled with magnification and glorification of Him.

Is it Bipolar Disorder or Depression?

noreply@blogger.com (Relief) — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 21:58:00 +0000

Bipolar disorder is commonly misdiagnosed as depression. One of the reasons is that most people with bipolar disorder seek help when they’re in the depressive stage of the illness. When they’re in the manic stage, they don’t recognize the problem. What’s more, most people with bipolar disorder are depressed a much greater percentage of the time than they are manic or hypomanic.

Being misdiagnosed with depression is a potentially dangerous problem because the treatment for bipolar depression is different than for regular depression. In fact, antidepressants can actually make bipolar disorder worse. So it’s important to see a mood disorder specialist who can help you figure out what’s really going on.
Indicators that your depression is really bipolar disorder:

* You’ve experienced repeated episodes of major depression.
* You had your first episode of major depression before age 25.
* You have a first-degree relative with bipolar disorder.
* When you’re not depressed, your mood and energy levels are higher than most people’s.
* When you’re depressed, you oversleep and overeat.
* Your episodes of major depression are short (less than 3 months)
* You’ve lost contact with reality while depressed.
* You’ve had postpartum depression before.
* You’ve developed mania or hypomania while taking an antidepressant.
* Your antidepressant stopped working after several months.
* You’ve tried 3 or more antidepressants without success.

Exploring bipolar disorder treatment options

If your doctor determines that you have bipolar disorder, he or she will explain your treatment options and possibly prescribe medication for you to take. You may also be referred to another mental health professional, such as a psychologist, counselor, or a bipolar disorder specialist. Together, you will work with your healthcare providers to develop a personalized treatment plan.

Comprehensive treatment for bipolar disorder

A comprehensive treatment plan for bipolar disorder aims to relieve symptoms, restore your ability to function, fix problems the illness has caused at home and at work, and reduce the likelihood of recurrence. A complete treatment plan involves:

*Medication – Medication is the cornerstone on bipolar disorder treatment. Taking a mood stabilizing medication can help minimize the highs and lows of bipolar disorder and keep symptoms under control.
*Psychotherapy – Therapy is essential for dealing with bipolar disorder and the problems it has caused in your life. Working with a therapist, you can learn how to cope with difficult or uncomfortable feelings, repair your relationships, manage stress, and regulate your mood.
*Education – Managing symptoms and preventing complications begins with a thorough knowledge of your illness. Education is a key component of treatment. The more you and your loved ones know about bipolar disorder, the better able you’ll be to avoid problems and deal with setbacks.
*Lifestyle management – By carefully regulating your lifestyle, you can keep symptoms and mood episodes to a minimum. This involves maintaining a regular sleep schedule, avoiding alcohol and drugs, following a consistent exercise program, minimizing stress, and keeping your sunlight exposure stable year round.
*Support – Living with bipolar disorder can be challenging, and having a solid support system in place can make all the difference in your outlook and motivation. Participating in a bipolar disorder support group gives you the opportunity to share your experiences and learn from others who know what you’re going through. The support of friends and family is also invaluable.

Treatment for Bipolar Disorder

noreply@blogger.com (Relief) — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 21:49:00 +0000

If you suspect that you or someone you know are suffering from bipolar disorder, seek help right away. The earlier you catch bipolar disorder and begin treating it, the better your chances of getting and staying well. An experienced mental health professional can make sure your symptoms are caused by bipolar disorder and get you the treatment you need.

Treatment for bipolar disorder can help you live life on your own terms, without the interference of mood swings. Effective bipolar disorder treatment relieves symptoms, reduces the frequency and intensity of manic and depressive episodes, and restores your ability to function.

Bipolar disorder is a lifelong condition. It runs an unpredictable course of ups and downs. When left untreated, these ups and downs can be devastating. The recurring manic and depressive episodes that characterize the disease make it difficult to lead a stable, productive life. In the manic phase, you may be hyperactive and irresponsible. In the depressive phase, it may be difficult to do anything at all. Early diagnosis and treatment can help you avoid these problems.

Successful treatment of bipolar disorder depends on a combination of factors. Medication alone is not enough. In order to get the most out of treatment, its important to educate yourself about the illness, communicate with your doctors and therapists, have a strong support system, make healthy lifestyle choices, and stick to your treatment plan.

Recovering from bipolar disorder doesn’t happen overnight. As with the mood swings of bipolar disorder, treatment has its own ups and downs. Finding the right treatments takes time and setbacks happen. But with careful management and a commitment to getting better, you can get your symptoms under control and live fully.

What are some things I can do that might help me feel better?

* Know the difference between your symptoms and your true self. Your health care providers can help you separate your true identity from your symptoms by helping you see how your illness affects your behavior. Be open about behaviors you want to change and set goals for making those changes.
* Educate your family and involve them in treatment when possible. They can help you spot symptoms, track behaviors and gain perspective. They can also give encouraging feedback and help you make a plan to cope with any future crises.
* Work on healthy lifestyle choices. Recovery is also about a healthy lifestyle, which includes regular sleep, healthy eating, and the avoidance of alcohol, drugs, and risky behavior.
* Find the treatment that works for you. Talk to your health care provider about your medications' effects on you, especially the side effects that bother you. There are many options for you to try. It is very important to talk to your health care provider first before you make any changes to your medication or schedule.

Do You Need Therapy

noreply@blogger.com (Relief) — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 12:47:00 +0000

DO YOU NEED THERAPY?
SUICIDAL THOUGHTS
Certainly the most important indicator that you need therapy is if you are having suicidal thoughts. This is especially true if you have begun to think that there are no other options left and that suicide is the only way to end this pain. If you have formulated a plan on how or when you will kill yourself, I urge you to seek help now! Make an appointment with a therapist as soon as possible or go to your local hospital, if the crisis is severe call a crisis help line and let them help you make it through the night, seek help in the morning. Suicidal thoughts and depression are episodic, in that you will have periods which are worse than at other times, but the intense feelings will abate if you give yourself time and seek counseling.

LOSING CONTROL
If you are no longer able to control your anger, if you are no longer able to control your periods of despair, if it seems that your life situation is no longer under your control and you are entirely at the mercy of someone or something else, if your interpersonal relationships are falling apart and your are at odds with members of your family and your co-workers and you are losing friends, if these things are happening to you there is a good chance that your depression is beginning to take control of your emotions and it is taking control of your life situation. If you do not make the decision to intervene and seek counseling your depression will worsen and regaining control will become more and more difficult.

ARE YOU GOING CRAZY?
You may have the feeling that you are going crazy. This is not an uncommon thought when a person first experiences the symptoms of depression. Without defining what the term "crazy" means, a person who is actually going crazy probably does not have a complete realization of what is happening to them and will most likely blame their problems on someone or something other than themselves. They many times think that they are sane and it is the rest of the world that has gone "crazy". The automatic thought "I think I am going crazy" arises due to a reaction to the symptoms of depression. The confusion, the loss of memory, the anger, the despair, the ups and downs (especially for manic depressives), and the loss of control of our emotions, all are perplexing when we first become depressed. This feeling that we are losing our minds happens as our depression begins to take control, it is also a very good indicator that intervention is needed and that it is time to seek therapy.

DOES THERE NEED TO BE A CRISIS?
Most of us only begin to consider that we need therapy when there is a crisis, where our life has come to a point where we are no longer in control, or we are having strong suicidal urges. Yet our depression does not have to reach a crisis stage before we seek therapy. One of the main reasons I am writing this article is to help people recognize the warning signs of depression so that they begin to work on healing before the depression reaches a crisis stage. In fact my ultimate goal is to inform enough people so that most of us do not even need therapy, but are able to recognize that we are depressed and use improved self help methods to avert a crisis and heal ourselves.

HOW TO START
Anyone who knows or suspects that they are depressed would be wise to first have a complete medical evaluation in order to determine if there is a possible organic cause of the depression. It is possible that certain medical disorders such as hypothyroidism are the cause, especially if the onset of depression is sudden or cannot be explained by reaction to environmental influences. The problem may also be caused by an adverse reaction to prescription or illegal drugs such as amphetamines. If you begin your therapy by going to a psychiatrist (who is also a MD) he/she will give you a medical evaluation, if you do not start with a psychiatrist then a complete physical by an internist or family doctor is recommended. While I do urge you to rule out any possible organic cause by seeing an MD, I do have reservations about beginning your therapy choices with a visit to an internist or family doctor. My concerns will be covered in the section on drugs and again in the section on pitfalls later in this article. I caution you not to become overly optimistic and fixate on the possibility that the depression has an organic origin because for most of us this is not the cause, but it should be investigated.

One of the first considerations when we are trying to heal or improve our mind is with our physical body. If we abuse or neglect our physical body, our mind will be adversely effected. Whether or not our depression has been caused by the abuse or neglect of our physical body, or if our depression can be cured by stopping the abuse or neglect is not what I am addressing at this time. The point is that if we abuse and neglect our physical body and we are depressed, the depression will be worsened and our efforts to heal our mind will be more difficult and take a longer period of time. This is true even if the method of therapy is drugs only, because if we are physically fit our body can more readily assimilate the drugs and possible side effects will have less of an impact.

If you determine that you are depressed, I do not suggest you undertake a rigorous program of physical exercise for the express purpose of ending the depression, especially if exercise is the only method used to combat the depression. It is not uncommon for a depressed person to begin an exercise program by buying an expensive pair of shoes, an exercise machine or sports club membership, and a new exercise outfit, only to find that within a short time the symptoms of depression make it impossible to follow the regimentation, commitment, and motivation needed to insure the success of the exercise program. There is a good chance that I will be buying your expensive exercise machine for ten cents on the dollar at a garage sale next summer. On the other hand, I do highly recommend that you start a mild program of physical exercise consisting of walking, stationary bicycling, or mild aerobics, for 20 to 30 minutes a day, five days a week. This will help clear your mind, it will help you focus while investigating your mental health care options, and mild exercise will help with motivation and commitment when first beginning your therapy.

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

noreply@blogger.com (Relief) — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 12:31:00 +0000

PTSD and Criminal Behavior

Claudia Baker, MSW, MPH and Cessie Alfonso, LCSW

Background

Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is described in the DSM IV as "the development of characteristic symptoms following exposure to an extreme traumatic stressor." In recent studies among incarcerated populations, PTSD has been found in approximately 48% of female inmates and 30% of male inmates. The following is an overview of PTSD, a discussion about how to arrive at a diagnosis, an explanation of how PTSD can play a role in criminal offenses, and a review of how PTSD may be acknowledged in sentencing procedures.

Overview

In order to accurately conceptualize PTSD, it is necessary to clearly understand what is meant by "extreme traumatic stressor." If an individual has not been exposed to a traumatic stressor, PTSD cannot be diagnosed. The definition of this term in the DSM IV is on the one hand very specific but on the other hand somewhat broad. A traumatic stressor must involve "actual or threatened death or serious injury or other threat to one's physical integrity." However, this event can be experienced directly, witnessed, or experienced vicariously. "Experienced vicariously" is defined as learning that a traumatic event occurred unexpectedly or violently to a family member or close associate. This definition includes many different types of experiences, from military combat to experiencing a natural disaster to growing up in an inner-city environment. Although the case citations in this fact sheet refer to combat-induced PTSD, it is very important to keep in mind that the disorder can result from many other traumatic events.

In addition to having survived such a traumatic event, an individual must exhibit symptoms from three categories: reexperiencing, avoidance/numbing, and increased baseline physiological arousal. Reexperiencing symptoms include intrusive thoughts of the trauma, nightmares, flashbacks, and "trigger responses" (i.e., becoming distressed when a stimulus reminiscent of the trauma is encountered). Avoidance/numbing symptoms include avoiding situations reminiscent of the trauma, amnesia relating to part of the trauma, isolation from others, and a general feeling of emotional numbness. Arousal symptoms include insomnia, angry outbursts or irritability, and a general sense of jumpiness. It is important to note that these symptoms do not always begin immediately following a traumatic event; often, symptoms of PTSD do not become evident until many years after the trauma.

How is the diagnosis of PTSD determined?

In order to establish a diagnosis of PTSD, the existence of an "extreme traumatic stressor" must be verified. In the case of combat-induced PTSD, this can be easily accomplished by obtaining military records and consulting with someone experienced in interpreting these documents. With other types of trauma, establishing the "extreme traumatic stressor" can be more problematic. However, depending on the nature of the trauma, other public documents or corroboration of the trauma from neutral sources may be useful..

Once the existence of a traumatic stressor has been established, the diagnosis of PTSD must be made by a mental-health professional with experience in trauma. Various instruments have been developed to assess for PTSD, including the Mississippi Scale for PTSD (combat and civilian versions), the Clinician Administered PTSD Scale for DSM IV, and certain portions of the Minnesota Multiphasic Personality Inventory. However, certain behaviors observed by a layperson can indicate the possibility of PTSD. Individuals with PTSD tend to be jumpy and irritable and can exhibit difficulty in concentrating. A psychiatrist with a great deal of experience in assessing for PTSD once stated, "Show me someone who is relaxed and claims to have PTSD and I will show you a charlatan." A survivor will exhibit genuine distress when discussing the traumatic event and will often attempt to avoid discussing it. Someone who tells the details of a trauma before being asked probably does not have PTSD.

In establishing the credibility of the diagnosis, it is also crucial to demonstrate that the symptoms and behaviors in question were not present prior to the trauma. It is also important to establish that the individual's level of functioning declined after the trauma. This requires obtaining information from someone who has been around the individual both before and after the trauma. With PTSD that arises from childhood abuse, this can be problematic because it is difficult to determine the premorbid level of functioning.

How is PTSD related to criminal behavior?

PTSD can be linked to criminal behavior in two primary ways. First, symptoms of PTSD can incidentally lead to criminal behavior. Second, offenses can be directly connected to the specific trauma that an individual experienced.

Many symptoms of PTSD can lead to a lifestyle that is likely to result in criminal behavior and/or sudden outbursts of violence. Individuals with PTSD are often plagued by memories of the trauma and are chronically anxious. Often, attempts are made to self-medicate with drugs and alcohol. The emotional numbness many trauma survivors experience can lead the survivor to engage in sensation-seeking behavior in an attempt to experience some type of emotion. Some combat veterans also may seek to recreate the adrenaline rush experienced during combat. Feeling the need to be always "on guard" can cause veterans to misinterpret benign situations as threatening and cause them to respond with self-protective behavior. Increased baseline physiological arousal results in violent behavior that is out of proportion to the perceived threat. It is common for trauma survivors to feel guilt, which can sometimes lead them to commit crimes that will likely result in their apprehension, punishment, serious injury, or death.

A direct link between a particular traumatic stressor and a specific crime can be indicated in three primary ways. First, crimes at times literally or symbolically recreate important aspects of a trauma. State v. Gregory (Maryland, 1979) provides an example of this type of case. Mr. Gregory, a Vietnam combat veteran, was charged with eight counts of kidnapping and assault after an incident at a bank in Silver Springs, MD on February 9, 1977. He entered the bank dressed in a suit with his military decorations pinned on it and armed with two M-16 automatic rifles, the weapon used by U.S. forces in Vietnam. He announced that he was not robbing the bank, let the women and children go, and took the remaining occupants hostage. Over a five-hour period, Mr. Gregory fired over 250 rounds of ammunition into the air and at inanimate objects before the police apprehended him without serious injury to anyone.

Mr. Gregory was initially convicted but the conviction was later overturned on appeal. The examining psychiatrist determined that Mr. Gregory had been one of very few survivors of an ambush in Vietnam, and the psychiatrist testified that the defendant's behavior in the bank was an attempt to recreate an ambush situation. Also, his behavior was viewed as an attempt at passive suicide in order to relieve the intense guilt he felt about having survived the ambush in Vietnam when so many others perished.

The second way that traumatic stressors can be linked to specific crimes is that environmental conditions similar to those existing at the time of the trauma can induce behavior (in particular, violent responses) similar to that exhibited during the trauma. People v. Wood (Illinois, 1982) is an example of this type of case. Mr. Wood was charged with attempted murder after shooting his foreman during a dispute. His prior diagnosis of PTSD and his history of combat duty in Vietnam were documented. Testimony and actual tape recordings were introduced that showed a similarity between the noises in the factory and noises Mr. Wood heard during combat, and it was argued that these conditions set the stage for Mr. Wood's violent behavior. The jury returned a verdict of not guilty by reason of insanity.

The final way that traumatic stressors can be linked to specific crimes is that life events immediately preceding the offense can realistically or symbolically force the individual to face unresolved conflicts related to the trauma. This creates a disturbed psychological state in which otherwise unlikely behaviors emerge. State v. Heads (Louisiana, 1981) is an example of this type of case. Mr. Heads, a Vietnam combat veteran with no prior criminal history, was convicted of second degree murder in 1978 after breaking into his sister-in-law's house and repeatedly firing a .45 caliber automatic pistol. One of the bullets killed the sister-in-law's husband. Mr. Heads had recently separated from his wife and had entered his sister-in-law's home in an attempt to locate her. Because he had experienced the loss of many friends in Vietnam, the severe emotional threat of losing his wife disrupted his psychological equilibrium and resulted in extremely violent behavior. In addition, the scene of the shooting in Louisiana was described as "Vietnam-like," which was seen as contributing to his violence. His conviction was overturned on appeal in 1981 when a jury returned a verdict of not guilty by reason of insanity.

Crimes that are directly linked to traumatic stressors usually have certain characteristics. Often, the defendant has no criminal history and cannot offer a coherent explanation for the behavior. Others may also find it difficult to discern any current motivation for the crime. The choice of a victim may seem accidental, and an apparently benign situation may result in violence. There may be amnesia surrounding all or part of the crime, and the individual may report that there were numerous stressors prior to the crime that related literally or psychologically to the original trauma. The act itself may also be linked symbolically or realistically to the original trauma. However, the individual is usually unaware of this connection.

How should PTSD be taken into consideration during criminal sentencing?

The presence of PTSD should be considered by the court during sentencing. If a defendant is diagnosed with PTSD, this information should be introduced as a mitigating factor during the penalty phase of a capital case. In states with versions of the "three strikes" law and in federal cases, the presence of PTSD may be reason for the court to depart from mandatory sentencing guidelines.

Various issues pertaining to an individual's traumatic experience and subsequent adjustment are relevant when PTSD is introduced in sentencing proceedings:

Was any type of treatment made available to the defendant either immediately after the event or in the months afterward? Crisis intervention among survivors of traumatic events is extremely important.

At what age did the trauma occur and what are the ramifications for the defendant's personality development? Although trauma at an early age can have a more pervasive effect on an individual's functioning, it is easier to document pre- and posttrauma personality changes when the stressors have been experienced at a later age.

If a defendant has a history of criminal convictions or poor adjustment during prior incarcerations, what is the role that undiagnosed PTSD may have played in this behavior? Because being in prison requires a person to be constantly vigilant regarding the threat of violence, an individual with PTSD who is in prison can be profoundly retraumatized and his or her PTSD symptoms may be exacerbated to the point where he or she will act out with violence.

Finally, what is the psychiatric prognosis? Although PTSD is a chronic condition, with the proper treatment and education, its symptoms can usually be successfully managed. It is unlikely that survivors receive the proper treatment for PTSD during incarceration. In fact, because prison life may retraumatize a person, a lengthy incarceration will likely seriously exacerbate PTSD symptoms and cause the person's level of functioning to deteriorate.

Conclusion

In sum, it is important to recognize when PTSD from previous traumatic stressors may play a role in criminal behavior. Be aware of possible PTSD symptoms, establish a legitimate and credible diagnosis (including documentation of the traumatic stressor, if possible), and discern how PTSD symptomatology or a previous traumatic stressor may have contributed to the criminal act.

A Breathing Exercise to Calm Panic Attacks

noreply@blogger.com (Relief) — Mon, 02 Nov 2009 14:29:00 +0000

A Breathing Exercise
to Calm Panic Attacks

Here's a simple breathing exercise that will restore your comfortable breathing and soothe many of the physical symptoms of a panic attack.

You may have already tried deep breathing and not had much success in soothing your panic symptoms. The reason for that is that most descriptions of deep breathing leave out a critical step.

A simple, but powerful, technique
If you have Panic Disorder or Social Phobia, this deep breathing exercise may be the single most important coping technique I can show you. It's also useful with other anxiety disorders in which the physical symptoms are less prominent, but still present. Comfortable, deep breathing is the key to relaxation. All the the traditional relaxation methods (yoga, meditation, hypnosis) place a central emphasis on breathing.

I can't catch my breath!
Feeling like "I can't catch my breath!" is probably the most common of all panic symptoms. Your breathing feels labored, you strain to take a deep breath, you fear you're not going to get it - and the harder you try, the worse it feels!
When you feel short of breath, it doesn't mean you're not getting enough air. In fact, people will often say "I can't catch my breath", and this shows that they're getting air, because we talk by making air vibrate. If you're talking, you're breathing! It's not a dangerous symptom.

But it does get people very scared, and it produces other uncomfortable physical symptoms, so it's worth your while to be able to correct it.

You've probably already had it told to you, and you've probably also read it as well, that what you need to do is "take a deep breath". If you're like most people, that advice hasn't helped you much. It's good advice, but it's incomplete. It doesn't tell you how to take a deep breath. A good breathing exercise should tell you how to take a deep breath, and that's what I'm going to do.

Here's the Key
When you feel like you can't catch your breath, it's because you forgot to do something.

You forgot to exhale.

That's right. Before you can take a deep breath, you have to give one away. Why? Because, when you've been breathing in a short, shallow manner (from your chest), if you try and take a deep inhale, you just can't do it. All you can do is take a more labored, shallow breath from your chest. That will give you all the air you need, but it won't feel good.

Go ahead, try that now and see what I mean. Put one hand on your chest, the other on your belly. Breathe very shallowly from your chest a few times, then try to take a deep breath. I think you'll find that, when you inhale, you use your chest muscles, rather than your diaphragm, or belly.

When you breathe in this shallow manner, you get all the air you need to live, but you can also get other symptoms which add to your panic.

You get chest pain or heaviness, because you've tightened the muscles of your chest to an uncomfortable degree. (The chest pain people feel in a panic attack isn't from the heart, it's from the muscles of the chest). You feel lightheaded or dizzy, because shallow breathing can produce the same sensations as hyperventilation. You also get a more rapid heartbeat, and maybe numbness or tingling in the extremities as well.

All from breathing short and shallow!

One of the very first things that people need to do is to learn and practice belly breathing.

Belly Breathing Exercise
1. Place one hand just above your belt line, and the other on your chest, right over the breastbone. You can use your hands as a simple biofeedback device. Your hands will tell you what part of your body, and what muscles, you are using to breathe.
2. Open your mouth and gently sigh, as if someone had just told you something really annoying. As you do, let your shoulders and the muscles of your upper body relax down with the exhale. The point of the sigh is not to completely empty your lungs. It's just to relax the muscles of your upper body.

3. Close your mouth and pause for a few seconds.

4. Keep your mouth closed and inhale slowly through your nose by pushing your stomach out. The movement of your stomach precedes the inhalation by just the tiniest fraction of a second, because it's this motion which is pulling the air in. When you've inhaled as much air as you can comfortably (without throwing your upper body into it), just stop. You're finished with that inhale.

5. Pause. How long? You decide. I'm not going to give you a specific count, because everybody counts at a different rate, and everybody has different size lungs. Pause briefly for whatever time feels comfortable. However, be aware that when you breathe this way, you are taking larger breaths than you're used to. For this reason, it's necessary to breathe more slowly than you're used to. If you breathe at the same rate you use with your small, shallow breaths, you will probably feel a little lightheaded from over breathing, and it might make you yawn. Neither is harmful. They're just signals to slow down. Follow them!

6. Open your mouth. Exhale through your mouth by pulling your stomach in.

7. Pause.

8. Continue with Steps 4-7

Advice to those unable to Conceive

noreply@blogger.com (Relief) — Sun, 14 Sep 2008 04:31:00 +0000

*Please appropriately reference this fatwa to: www.fatwa-online.com, thankyou!*
Question: A woman is grieving because she is not pregnant; And sometimes she cries and ends up thinking a lot and becomes withdrawn from life, so what is the ruling and what advice do you have for her?

Response: It is not befitting for this woman to grieve and cry because she is unable to conceive. This is because the natural ability in the man and the woman to conceive and have children, whether they be male only or female only or part male and part female, and the inability of the man and the woman to conceive - all of this is by the decree of Allaah ('Azza wa Jall). He (Subhaanau wa Ta'aala) says:

{To Allaah belongs the kingdom of the heavens and the earth. He creates what He wills. He bestows female (offspring) upon whom He wills, and bestows male (offspring) upon whom He wills. Or He bestows both males and females, and He renders barren whom He wills. Verily, He is All-Knower and is Able to do all things}, Soorah ash-Shooraa, Aayahs 49-50

So He ('Azza wa Jall) is All-Knowing as to who is deserving of all these, and is All Able to do what He chooses.

And there is a good example for the female questioner in (the story of) Yahya ibn Zakariyyaa and 'Eesaa ibn Maryam (upon them both be peace); Neither of the two had children, so, she is required to be content (with what Allaah has decreed for her) and ask Allaah for her needs, as He has the most encompassing Wisdom and Ability.

And there is no harm in her presenting herself to some of the specialist female doctors, and male doctors should she be unable to find a specialist female doctor. It is quite possible that which is preventing her from conceiving can be treated such as blocked tubes. And likewise, it is befitting that her husband present himself to a specialist male doctor since it is quite possible that he himself is the cause of his wife not being able to conceive.

And with Allaah lies all success and may Allaah send prayers and salutations upon our Prophet Muhammad (sal-Allaahu `alayhe wa sallam) and his family and his companions.

The Permanent Committee for Islaamic Research and Verdicts
Fataawa al-Lajnah ad-Daa.imah lil-Buhooth al-'Ilmiyyah wal-Iftaa. - Fatwa No.8844
al-Fataawa al-Muta'alliqah bit-Tibb wa Ahkaam al-Mardhaa - Pages 308-309

How to let go of guilt and learn to forgive

noreply@blogger.com (Relief) — Thu, 22 May 2008 10:10:00 +0000

From the Qur'an
{It is part of the Mercy of Allah that you deal gently
with them. Were you severe or harsh-hearted, they would have
gone away from you: so pass over (their faults), and
ask for (Allah's) forgiveness for them; and consult them in the
affairs (of the moment). Then, when you have taken a decision, place
your trust in Allah. For Allah loves those who place their trust
(in Him).} 3:159

[Lessons from this verse] It is not the snake bite that kills,
it's the venom that flows through the blood. The antidote is
forgiving people. Don't let anger rent space in your mind and
heart. Forgive and pass over people's faults.

"Strength of character means the ability to overcome resentment against others, to hide hurt feelings, and to forgive quickly."

"To love means loving the unlovable. To forgive means pardoning the unpardonable. Faith means believing the unbelievable. Hope means hoping when everything seems hopeless."

"To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you."

"Do everything. Love as much as you can. it may hurt but it helps us grow. Give all you have...you may be poor but you will be content. Always forgive....your heart can not afford not to. Teach what you know and learn what you don't. Stay open to all"

"Before you speak, listen.
Before you write, think.
Before you spend, earn.
Before you invest, investigate.
Before you criticize, wait.
Before you pray, forgive.
Before you quit, try.
Before you retire, save.
Before you die, give."

"Do more than belong: participate. Do more than care: help. Do more than believe: practice. Do more than be fair: be kind. Do more than forgive: forget. Do more than dream: work."

A kindergarten teacher decided to let her class play a game. The teacher told each child in the class to bring along a plastic bag containing a few potatoes. Each potato will be given a name of a person that the child hates, so the number of potatoes that a child will put in his/her plastic bag will depend on the number of people he/she hates.

So when the day came, every child brought some potatoes with the name of the people he/she hated. Some had 2 potatoes; some 3 while some up to 5 potatoes. The teacher then told the children to carry with them the potatoes in the plastic bag wherever they go for 1 week.

Days after days passed by, and the children started to complain due to the unpleasant smell let out by the rotten potatoes. Besides, those having 5 potatoes also had to carry heavier bags.

After 1 week, the children were relieved because the game had finally ended. The teacher asked: "How did you feel while carrying the potatoes with you for 1 week?" The children let out their frustrations and started complaining of the trouble that they had to go through having to carry the heavy and smelly potatoes wherever they go.

Then the teacher told them the hidden meaning behind the game.

The teacher said: "This is exactly the situation when you carry your hatred for somebody inside your heart. The stench of hatred will contaminate your heart and you will carry it with you wherever you go. If you cannot tolerate the smell of rotten potatoes for just 1 week, can you imagine what is it like to have the stench of hatred in your heart for your lifetime???"

Moral:
Throw away any hatred for anyone from your heart so that you will not carry sins for a life time. Forgiving others is the best attitude to take! Forget & Forgive!!!

WE HAVE ALL DONE THINGS THAT WE ARE NOT PROUD OF. Perhaps we were not there for a friend when they needed us, or we may have been responsible for unhappiness in our family. These sorts of past actions can leave us feeling ashamed and guilty, and we can end up carrying our guilt for years.

Guilt is probably one of the most debilitating and negative emotions there is – one that can, and often does, destroy a person's life. But if we want to live happy lives, we need to deal with the consequences of our past actions and move on, rather than allowing our lives to be wracked with guilt.

Feeling guilty should not be confused with taking responsibility for our past. Responsibility means "the ability to respond", and therefore taking responsibility means that we actively address the consequences of our actions in whatever way we can, in particular by changing our behavior patterns. Taking responsibility also includes moving on by making peace with the past.

Unlike taking responsibility, which is redeeming and positive, guilt has absolutely no value. Guilt does not encourage us to change in positive ways but debilitates us, leaving us unable to take the action we need to bring about change.

Breaking out of the guilt cycle
As a behavior pattern, guilt often becomes a self-perpetuating cycle: we do something, we feel guilty about it, we punish ourselves and, because we feel bad, we end up repeating our behavior at the next available opportunity.

This debilitating cycle continues largely because we do not take full responsibility for our actions or for changing our behavior. So how do we start the process of taking responsibility? By considering, with complete honesty, the part we play in any situation and by accepting our role in creating the events.

The purpose of this self-examination is to evaluate truthfully whatever occurred so that we can learn how we contributed. Through learning and honest self-assessment, we change our thinking and behavior. We can also forgive ourselves and move on with experience and wisdom.

Real forgiveness
In this process, forgiveness is vital. However, forgiveness is not what we generally believe it to be.

Real forgiveness has nothing to do with feeling of "sorry or apologizing" – neither of which actually changes anything. True forgiveness is contained in its literal meaning. The word "forgive" is very old, and the prefix "for" means literally "to reject." So the word as a whole means "to reject the giving".

We need "to reject the giving" because, if we think we have wronged someone, we use our sense of guilt to "give" to that person. By giving, we hope to make it better, and to exonerate ourselves from our actions. Conversely, if we feel that someone has wronged us, we will continue to demand payment for that offense, and thus want the other person to "give" to us.

But giving from a sense of guilt can never lead us to forgiveness. Neither can forgiveness be bestowed by another; it has to be brought about by ourselves. In the end, unless we can reject all this giving and truly forgive ourselves, we can never really move on and be free of the past.

How does forgiveness work in practice? Say that you have had a history of being abusive towards others, but have started to take responsibility for your past by changing your behavior. The reality is that you can still have unresolved feelings about what you have done. The process of forgiveness enables you to resolve these unresolved feelings so that you can move on.

It is important to remember that feeling bad about the past never really allows us to move on. What's more, if we indulge in feeling bad, this implies that we view our past as meaningless and of no value. What a waste! For, if we have caused harm, surely we should try to learn from our actions rather than living with a heap of regrets?

Forgiving ourselves involves finding value in our experiences. Instead of just writing off an experience as a painful episode, and trying to forget it, we should look for the value in that experience and try to take out of the experience whatever we can learn.

Toltecs look upon life as a journey of learning, and say that all true learning or knowledge is experiential. Because we are stubborn and tend to avoid change, much of our learning does come about through painful experiences. However, if we wish to grow and to use our experiences as a learning curve, it is vital that we focus on what we have learned, rather than the pain.

By searching for learning and value from our past, we ensure that there is no more need to give or demand payment - we can, indeed, "reject the giving" and so forgive.

To take meaning and value out of any situation, simply ask, "What has this taught me? What lessons can I learn: about myself, about others and about my life? How can I use this new knowledge to change my thinking and behavior and help others avoid the same trap?"

In this light our past, instead of being meaningless and shameful, has a positive and life-enhancing value. By learning to handle our past, and by taking the steps to forgive ourselves in the true sense of the word, we can let go of the debilitating consequences of guilt, and finally move on.

"Say: 'O my servants who have transgressed against their souls! Despair not of the Mercy of Allah: for Allah forgives all sins for He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful." Surah Al-Zumar, chapter 39 verse 53-55

Courtesy: T H É U N M A R E S

A Sermon of `Abdullah Ibn Mas`ood

noreply@blogger.com (Relief) — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 20:15:00 +0000

Related by Abu Nu`aim in Hilyat al-Awliyaa'

Amr ibn Thabit narrated that `Abdullaah ibn Mas`ood said in one of his sermons: "Surely the most truthful speech is that of the Qur'aan, the Book of Allah; and the best of covenants and bonds are an expression of piety; the best of persuasions is that of Ibraaheem and the best of traditions are those of Muhammad. The most noble and exalted of speeches and conversations is to talk about Allah the best and most truthful of stories are told in the Qur'aan; the worth of a good deed will show at the end, and the most evil of deeds are innovations; to have less of what satisfies one's needs is better than to have aplenty one cannot compass or control; the worst self-blaming (nafsu lawwaama) is sorrow when death comes to seize the person, and the worst grief is to have regret on the Day of Judgment; the worst of aberration is to stray from Allah's path after receiving His guidance; true prosperity is to have satisfaction and contentment; the best provision for the hereafter is piety; suspicion is a branch of apostasy; the worst blindness is that of the heart; wine is the source of every evil; the temptation about women is the rope of Shaytaan; teenage heralds the growing up of arrogance and folly; mourning losses is a pagan act; some people come late to the Friday's congregational prayers, dragging their feet, and they speak of Allaah illusively.

In fact, to lie is the greatest sin; to insult a believer is an act of insolence; and to fight a believer is apostasy. The sanctity of the property of a believer is as sacred as his life; one who pardons the sins of others, Allah will forgive him his sins, and one who swallows his anger, Allah will reward him, one who forgives others, Allah will forgive him, and one who bears his adversity,
Allah will reward him aplenty.

The most evil of earnings is money made of usury and accumulation of interest; the worst of food is to eat up the inheritance of orphan. The luckiest of people is one who takes heed of the reason behind others' misfortunes; and the unlucky is thus conceived in the womb of his mother. Sufficient for you is what satisfies your basic needs; surely the lag of one's journey will culminate in a grave six linear feet long; one's real goal will eventually be seen at the end, - and truth will surely manifest at the end. The results of one's actions will expose his initial intention; the worst story is a lie; the best death is that of a martyr; one who knows the value of adversities will bear them, and one who does not understand that will question the reason behind them. Allah will surely bring an arrogant person to humiliation. Whosoever vies to capture the world will reach a dead end, and whosoever obeys Shaytaan would have disobeyed Allah and finally, whosoever disobeys Allah will be punished in hell-fire."

Preventing Majic Before it Happens

noreply@blogger.com (Relief) — Tue, 11 Dec 2007 01:48:00 +0000

What are the prescribed means of warding off sihr before it happens?.

Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Among the most important means of warding off the danger of sihr before it happens is seeking protection through the adhkaar (dhikr) prescribed in Islam, making du’aa’ and reciting prayers seeking refuge that were narrated from the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). These include:

1 – Reciting Aayat al-Kursiy [al-Baqarah 2:255] after every prescribed prayer, after reciting the adhkaar which are prescribed after the salaam.

2 – Reciting Aayat al-Kursiy when going to sleep. This is the greatest aayah in the Qur’aan, in which Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Allaah! Laa ilaaha illa Huwa (none has the right to be worshipped but He), Al-Hayyul-Qayyum (the Ever Living, the One Who sustains and protects all that exists). Neither slumber nor sleep overtakes Him. To Him belongs whatever is in the heavens and whatever is on the earth. Who is he that can intercede with Him except with His Permission? He knows what happens to them (His creatures) in this world, and what will happen to them in the Hereafter. And they will never compass anything of His Knowledge except that which He wills. His Kursiy extends over the heavens and the earth, and He feels no fatigue in guarding and preserving them. And He is the Most High, the Most Great”

[al-Baqarah 2:255]

3 – Reciting “Qul huwa Allaahu ahad”, “Qul a’oodhu bi Rabb il-Falaq” and “Qul a’oodhu bi Rabb il-Naas” [i.e., the last three soorahs of the Qur’aan] following every prescribed prayer, and reciting these three soorahs (three times) at the beginning of the day after Fajr prayer, and at the beginning of the night after Maghrib prayer.

4 – Reciting the last two aayahs of Soorat al-Baqarah at the beginning of the night. These are the aayahs in which Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“The Messenger (Muhammad) believes in what has been sent down to him from his Lord, and (so do) the believers. Each one believes in Allaah, His Angels, His Books, and His Messengers. (They say,) ‘We make no distinction between one another of His Messengers’ — and they say, ‘We hear, and we obey. (We seek) Your forgiveness, our Lord, and to You is the return (of all).’

Allaah burdens not a person beyond his scope. He gets reward for that (good) which he has earned, and he is punished for that (evil) which he has earned. ‘Our Lord! Punish us not if we forget or fall into error, our Lord! Lay not on us a burden like that which You did lay on those before us (Jews and Christians); our Lord! Put not on us a burden greater than we have strength to bear. Pardon us and grant us forgiveness. Have mercy on us. You are our Mawlaa (Patron, Supporter and Protector) and give us victory over the disbelieving people”

[al-Baqarah 2:285-285]

And it was narrated in a saheeh report that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Whoever recites Aayat al-Kursiy at night will have ongoing protection from Allaah and no devil will come near him until morning comes.” And it was also narrated in a saheeh report that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Whoever recites the last two aayahs of Soorat al-Baqarah at night, that will suffice him.” The meaning – and Allaah knows best – is that that will be sufficient protection for him against all evil.

5 – Seeking refuge in the perfect words of Allaah from the evil of that which He has created, night and day and when stopping to rest anywhere, be it in the city, in the desert, in the air or on the sea. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Whoever stops to rest and says, ‘A’oodhu bi kalimaat Allaah il-taammah min sharri ma khalaq (I seek refuge in the perfect words of Allaah from the evil of that which He has created),’ nothing will harm him until he moves on from that place.”

6 – The Muslim should say at the beginning of the day and the beginning of the night (three times): “Bismillaah alladhi laa yadurr ma’a ismihi shay’un fi’l-ardi wa laa fi’l-samaa’i wa huwa al-samee’ al-‘aleem (In the name of Allaah with Whose name nothing on earth or in heaven can cause harm, and He is the All-Hearing, All-Knowing).” According to saheeh reports, the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) urged us to recite this, and this is a means of keeping safe from all evil.

These adhkaar and prayers for refuge are among the greatest means of warding off the evil of sihr (witchcraft) and other evils, for the one who recites them regularly with sincerity and faith, putting his trust in Allaah and depending upon Him, and being content with that.

They are also some of the most effective weapons for warding off sihr after it has happened, along with humbly beseeching Allaah constantly and asking Him to remove the harm and relieve the distress. Among the du’aa’s which have been narrated from the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) to treat diseases such as sihr and other things is the ruqyah by means of which he (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to treat his companions: “Allaahumma Rabb al-naas, adhhib il-ba’s, washfi anta al-Shaafi laa shifaa’a illa shifaa’uka shifaa’an laa yughaadir saqaman (O Allaah, Lord of mankind, remove the harm and heal him, for You are the Healer and there is no healing except Your healing, with a healing which does not leave any disease behind).” There is also the ruqyah by means of which Jibreel treated the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): “Bismillaah urqeeka min kulli shay’in yu’dheeka, wa min sharri kulli nafsin aw ‘aynin haasid Allaah yashfeek, bismillaah urqeek (In the name of Allaah I perform ruqyah for you, from every thing that is harming you, from the evil of every soul or envious eye may Allaah heal you, in the name of Allaah I perform ruqyah for you).” This should be repeated three times. And Allaah knows best.

Majmoo’ Fataawa wa Maqaalaat al-Shaykh ‘Abd al-‘Azeez ibn Baaz (may Allaah have mercy on him), vol. 8

I DON'T NEED A COUNSELOR, I NEED A FRIEND

noreply@blogger.com (Relief) — Wed, 28 Nov 2007 23:11:00 +0000

by Velma Cook

Life is full of pressure. I have to make money to be successful, whatever that means. So often people assess me superficially, not really knowing who I am and how I may have been terribly successful in some areas of my life, but they only see me according to their context; what they want to see. People ask 'How are you?' but don't usually care about the answer. They say 'Have a nice day,' but inwardly couldn't care less.

I have to be tolerant and flexible until I don't have any opinions left. Children must be trained to behave in a certain way so they will be 'acceptable' to society. I am also supposed to discover myself and my potential plus fulfill it or people will say I am oppressed, even though I may be perfectly happy as I am. At the same time I must be on my guard against advertising, brain-washing, political facades or I'll be guilty of being naive. One's spouse is supposed to be completely fulfilled with me or my marriage will break down.

No wonder I feel unsure of myself and often lonely. People say we all need counselors these days. Some therapy to help us through. But how can I spill the beans; tell all my secret insecurities and fears to a complete stranger, who has been trained to have no opinion, no bias, acting like a mirror to all my faults and weaknesses. A face with nothing behind it. It is like you sit and talk to yourself, pay the money and go home. You still feel lonely.

I need someone who thinks and feels like me. Dreams the same kinds of dreams, understands my fears and loves me anyway. Someone who will love me enough to tell me the truth, even if I don't really like it. I need a friend.

It's trendy to have a counselor or therapy nowadays. Why? Have we become obsessed with material possessions to the point that we leave behind the valuable things in life, like family and friends?

Families used to help each other financially. Now we have Social Security. Families used to protect and represent each other, now there are court cases for every trivial matter. A good way of making money out of people's problems, ignorance and misery. Families used to support each other, now we have counseling and therapy from strangers. Nearly everything has become controlled by the government and centralized yet people call the society 'free'.

Families are disintegrating and friends come and go, as we seek the world and all it contains, with a greed that is never satiated. Maybe if we focus on 'real' things, important things, like developing our Iman, deepening our submission to Allah, gaining knowledge and nurturing our families and those around us then, most of our overwhelming problems will simply disappear.

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This article was posted with the permission of the author, Velma Cook. For more articles written by Velma Cook, please check out her websites below. Jazakallah khairun.

Your Guide to Exploring Islam via the World Wide Web
http://www.islamicgarden.com
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Dead Hearts

noreply@blogger.com (Relief) — Sat, 24 Nov 2007 23:17:00 +0000

Imaam ibn al-Qayyim al-Jawziyyah rahimahullaah
Taken from Al Jumuah, Vol 8 Issue

While thousands of Muslims are killed all over the world, and while tens of thousands are imprisoned and tortured for calling to the path of Allah and for enjoining the good and forbidding the evil, most Muslims remain remarkably silent and have no worry except for the material things of life. Their hearts have been filled with the love of this life and the forgetfulness of the Hereafter.

Allah says in the Qur'an: "You will indeed find them, of all people, most greedy of life, even more than those who do not believe in Resurrection. Each one of them wishes he could be given a life of a thousand years. But the grant of such life will not save him even a little from due punishment. For Allah sees well all that they do." (Al Baqarah, 2:96)

Many Muslims today have become so much attached to their life that their desire is to dwell among their family, house, money and commerce. They have forgotten that matters of the Hereafter should come before matters of this life and that we must strive to follow the orders of Allah, not just those we find easy and convenient to follow. Some Muslims today claim that it is better to perform extra prayers and extra fasting rather than enjoin the good and forbid the evil or defend the lives of weak Muslims. Such people would even blame the Muslims who strive to perform these obligations.

This is what Ibn al-Qayyim had to say about such people: ''The Shaitan has misled most people by beautifying for them the performance of certain voluntary acts of worship such as voluntary prayers and voluntary fasting while neglecting other obligatory acts of worship such as enjoining the good and eradicating the evil, to the extent that they do not even make the intention of performing them whenever they are able to. Such people are considered by the scholars to be on the bottom of the scale of religion: For the essence of our religion is to perform what Allah ordered us to do. The one who does not perform his obligations is actually worse than the one who performs sins. Anyone having some knowledge about the revelation of Allah, the guidance of the Prophet, sallallahu alayhe wa sallam, and the life of the companions would conclude that those who are pointed at today as the most pious people are in fact the least pious. Indeed, what kind of piety is there in a person who witnesses Allah's sanctities being violated, his religion abandoned, the Sunnah of His Messenger shunned, and yet remains still with a cold heart and a shut mouth' Such a person is like a dumb Shaitan! In the same way the one who talks falsehood is a speaking Shaitan. Isn't the misfortune of Islam due only to those who whenever their life and food are secure, would not care about what happens to the religion? The best among them would offer a sorry face. But if they were challenged in one of the things their heart is attached to like their money, they would spare no efforts to get it back. These people, besides deserving the anger of Allah, are afflicted with the greatest calamity without even knowing it: They have a dead heart. Indeed the more alive a person's heart is, the stronger its anger for the sake of Allah and the more complete his support to Islam and Muslims." (A'alaam al-Muwaqqi'een, volume 2, page 176).

Remaining Steadfast After Ramadan

noreply@blogger.com (Relief) — Thu, 08 Nov 2007 01:55:00 +0000

By Shaykh Salih Al-Fouzan

Sufyan Ibn `Abdullah, may Allah be pleased with him, said: "O Messenger of Allah, tell me something about Islam, which I cannot ask anyone else besides you." He said: "Say: 'I believe in Allah' and then be steadfast (upon that)." [Sahih Muslim]
The Hadith is proof that the servant is obligated, after having Iman in Allah, to persevere and be steadfast upon obeying Him by performing the obligatory acts and avoiding the prohibited ones. This is achieved by following the Straight Path, which is the firm Religion without drifting away from it, to the right or to the left.
If the Muslim lives through Ramadan and spent his days in fasting and his nights in prayer and he accustomed himself to doing acts of good, then he must continue to remain upon this obedience to Allah at all times. This is the true state of the slave, for indeed, the Lord of the months is One and He is ever watchful and witnessing over his servants at all times.
Indeed, steadfastness after Ramadan and the rectification of one's statements and actions are the greatest signs that one has gained benefit from the month of Ramadan and striven in obedience. They are tokens of reception and signs of success.
Furthermore, the deeds of a servant do not come to an end with the end of a month and the beginning of another, rather they continue and extend until he reaches death. Allah says: {And worship your Lord until the certainty (death) comes to you}. (Al-Hijr: 99)
If the fasting of Ramadan comes to an end, then indeed the voluntary fasting is still prescribed throughout the entire year. If standing in prayer at night during Ramadan comes to an end, then indeed, the entire year is a time for performing the night prayer. And if the Zakat-ul-Fitr comes to an end, then there is still the Zakah that is obligatory as well as the voluntary charity that lasts the whole year. This goes the same for reciting the Qur'an and pondering over its meaning as well as every other righteous deed that is sought, for they can be done at all times. From the many bounties that Allah has bestowed upon his servants is that He has placed for them many different types of righteous acts and provided many means for doing good deeds. Therefore, the ardor and zeal of the Muslim must be constant and he must continue to remain in the service of his Lord.
It is unfortunate to find that some people perform worship by doing different types of righteous deeds during Ramadan. They guard strictly upon their five daily prayers in the Masjid, they recite the Qur'an a lot and they give in charity from their wealth. But when Ramadan comes to an end, they grow lazy in their worship. Rather, sometimes they even abandon the obligations, both generally, such as praying in congregation, and specifically, such as praying the Fajr prayer.
And they commit forbidden acts such as sleeping over the time of prayers, indulging in places of foolishness and entertainment, and mingling in parks, especially on the day of `Eid. Obtaining help from these evils is only through the grace of Allah. Thus, they demolish what they have constructed and destroy what they have established. This is an indication of deprivation and a sign of perdition. We ask Allah for His safeguarding and protection.
Indeed, this type of people take the example of turning in repentance and ceasing from committing evil deeds as something specific and restricted to the month of Ramadan. And they stop doing these (good) acts when the month stops. Thus, it is as if they have abandoned sinning for the sake of Ramadan, and not out of fear of Allah. How evil are these people who do not know Allah, except in Ramadan!
Truly, the success that Allah grants His servant lies in the fasting of Ramadan. His assisting him to do that is a great favor, thus the calls for the servant to be grateful to his Lord. This understanding can be found in the statement of Allah after completing the favor of the month of fasting:
{(He wants that you) must complete the same number of days, and that you must magnify Allah (by saying Allahu Akbar) for having guided you, so that you may be grateful to Him}. (Al-Baqarah: 185)
The one who is grateful for having fasted, will remain upon that condition and continue to perform righteous deeds.
Verily, the true way of the Muslim is that of one who praises and thanks his Lord for giving him the ability to fast and make Qiyam. His condition after Ramadan is better than it was before Ramadan. He is more receptive to obey, desiring to do good deeds and quick to enforce the obligatory acts. This is because he has gained benefit form this prominent institute of learning. It is that of one who fears for having his fast not accepted, for indeed Allah only accepts from those who fear Him.
The righteous predecessors would struggle to complete and perfect their deeds, hoping afterwards, that it would be accepted and fearing that it would be rejected. From the reports of `Ali, "Be more concerned with having your deeds accepted than the deed itself. Did you not hear Allah say: {Verily Allah, only accepts those from those who fear Him. ( i.e. possess Taqwa)}. [5: 27] "[Lata'if ul Ma`arif, p. 246]
`A'ishah said: "I asked the Messenger of Allah concerning the ayah: 'And the one who are given what they are given and their hearts tremble with fear.' Are they the ones who drink alcohol and steal?" He said: "No, o daughter of As-Siddiq. Rather, they are the ones who fast and pray and give in charity yet fear that it won't be accepted from them. They are the ones who rush to do good deeds and they are the first to do them." [Sahih Sunan At-Tirmidhi 3/79-80]
So be warned and again be warned of turning backward after having attained guidance of going astray after persevering. And ask Allah to provide you with duration in doing righteous deeds and continuity in performing good acts. And ask Allah that He grant you a good end, so that He may accept our Ramadan from us.

Taqabala Minha Wa Minkum

noreply@blogger.com (Relief) — Fri, 12 Oct 2007 12:51:00 +0000

Congratulating one another on the days of ‘Eid
People may exchange congratulations and good greetings on Eid, no matter what form the words take. For example they may say to one another, “Taqabbal Allâhu minnaa wa minkum (May Allâh accept [the fast and worship] from us and from you” or “Eid mubarak” and other similar permissible greetings. [Al-Mughnee: by ibn Qudaamah: vol. 2, p. 259]

Jubayr ibn Nufayr said: “At the time of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him), when people met one another on the day of Eid, they would say, ‘Taqabbal Allâhu minnaa wa minka (May Allâh accept from us and from you).’” (Ibn Hajar. Its isnaad is hasan. Fathul Baaree: vol.2, p. 446).

The practice of exchanging greetings was well-known at the time of the Sahaabah and scholars such as Imaam Ahmad and others allowed it. There are reports which indicate that it is permissible to congratulate people on special occasions. The Sahaabah used to congratulate one another when something good happened, such as when Allâh accepted a person’s repentance and so on. There is no doubt that congratulating others in this way is one of the noblest kinds of good manners and one of the highest social qualities among Muslims.

At the very least, one can return Eid greetings when they are given to you, and remain silent if nothing is said, as Imaam Ahmad (may Allâh have mercy on him) said: “If someone congratulates me, I return the greeting, but I do not initiate it.”

Whoever misses salaatul ‘Eid with the congregation may pray two rak’at
In Sahih al-Bukhari we find in the chapter entitled: “Whoever missed the ‘Eid prayer should pray two Raka’ah, and similarly the women and those who are at home and in the villages should do so, as is confirmed by the statement of the Prophet (!): “O Muslims, this our ‘Eid”. Anas ibn Maalik at Az-Zaawiyah ordered his slave ibn Abee Ghaneeyah to collect his (Anas’s) family and off-spring. Anas led prayer similar to that offered by townspeople and recited takbeer similar to theirs. ‘Ekrimah said: “The villagers should gather on the day of ‘Eid and offer two raka’ah as the Imaam does.” ‘Ataa said, “Whoever misses the ‘Eid prayer should pray two raka’ah.” [Sahih Al-Buukhari: vol. 2, p. 55, chapter. 25].

Advice after the First 10 Days of Ramadan

noreply@blogger.com (Relief) — Mon, 24 Sep 2007 23:08:00 +0000

This is a quick translation of Sheikh Salah al Fowzan's daily talk before Taraweeh Prayer in his Masjid in Malz, Riyadh, Kingdom of Saudi Arabia.

In The Name of Allah, The Most Merciful, The Bestower of His Mercy. May peace and blessings of Allah be upon His Messenger Muhammad, and upon Muhammed's family and companions.

For that which precedes,

Verily in the slow passing of nights and days are a sign and lesson for those who take heed. This is the reality of life, it begins, and then becomes shorter and shorter until it ends. There is nothing that is everlasting in the dunya (life), rather everything continues toward decrease and conclusion. This is because this life is a passing life. But Allah has made this life and means of planting (obtaining) for the hereafter. This life is a chance for the pious and righteous individuals to gain through their righteous actions. This takes place for the one whom Allah has given success to take advantage of this opportunity. But as for the one who wastes this opportunity and is negligent of it, then verily this life will end and pass while that individual is upon non-righteous actions and sin. He will therefore move to the hereafter while in a state of loss, we seek refuge in Allah from this state. This person will not have righteous deeds in his book. Indeed this is a terrible loss. As for the one who benefits from this life, then he alone will benefit from his hereafter. But the one who wastes this life, he will waste his hereafter. (Sentence that I can't make out)... So be aware of this matter oh Muslim! And take advantage of your time, race toward repentance and righteous deeds before this chance slips through your hands. If you do not do so, you will knock on the door of the hereafter without having any good deeds, and you will bite your hands out of regret and sorrow. Allah says:

{When death comes to one of them, they will say: Oh my Lord return me!

Allah responds to this by saying:

{NO}

Meaning: There is no return.

Allah continues to say:

{Verily this is a statement that he has said}

Meaning: This regretful, destroyed individual must say such a statement, and he must feel sorrow once his time (death) has come.

Allah says (in another verse):

{Oh you who believe, do not allow your children nor wealth to distract you from the remembrance of Allah. Whoever does so, they will be lost}

Even if this person possessed the wealth of this dunya, if he is negligent and distracted from the remembrance of Allah, he will still be lost. This is because salvation is not based on gaining wealth, rather it is based on working for the hereafter and its happiness. This is the true beneficial trading.

Allah says:

{Should I not inform you of a trade that will save you from severe punishment?! Belief in Allah and His Messenger, and fighting in the way of Allah with your wealth and bodies. Indeed this is better for you if only you knew. Allah will forgive you for your sins and enter you into paradise underneath which rivers flow, and grant you comfortable homes in this everlasting paradise. Indeed this is great success}

Therefore, this is the beneficial trade. But as for gathering wealth in large amounts, if this is not done in obedience to Allah and seeking His pleasure, and if one does not use this wealth to perform righteous actions, and he does not spend it in the way of Allah, then this wealth will become a means of loss for its owners.

Allah says:

{Spend from that which We have granted you before death approaches, and then a person will say: Oh my Lord delay my death until a later time in order that I may give charity and be from the righteous! Allah will not delay a soul when its time (death) has approached. Verily Allah is all aware of what you do}

The Messenger (sallAllahu alayhi wa salem) mentioned that everyone will regret once death approaches. If a person was righteous, he/she will regret that they did not increase upon their good deeds. Once a person sees the great, wonderful reward for these actions, they will regret not having increased in good deeds. And if one is negligent and wasted his life, he will regret what he has wasted and neglected in this life.

Verily death and the end is close!

You began The Month of Ramadan, and now the first 10 days have passed. Now you are at the doors of the 10 middle days, and whomever Allah gives life to will reach the last 10 days, and then the month will end. The question is: What will these days end upon, and what will the hours pass upon? A Muslim should think and reflect. The businessmen and those who possess large amounts of wealth constantly review and monitor their wealth. They monitor whether they profited and not, and if they realize that they did not profit in a business deal, they will abstain from the sort of dealing and focus on another (seeking profit). Therefore, those that work and trade for the hereafter should more so do such monitoring. They should always monitor their actions and see where they have gained or not. They should increase in righteous deeds and repent from evil deeds. Allah says:

{Oh you who believe, fear Allah, and let every soul look toward that which it has put fourth for tomorrow. And fear Allah, verily Allah is all aware of what you do. DO NOT BE like those who have forgotten Allah and as a result, Allah made them forget themselves}

When these individuals forgot Allah and forgot that which Allah has made obligatory upon them, Allah made them forget themselves. How can a person forget himself?! This is amazing. Does a person own anything more precious and valuable then himself? But if a person forgets himself, Allah will make this person forget himself, and he will not seek good for himself, nor will he safeguard himself from evil. This is the major loss. Verily the lost individual is the one who has lost himself and his family on The Day of Judgment. Verily this is the major loss.

Therefore, it is upon us all to think and reflect. All of us are sinners and wrong doers, but upon us is to increase in repentance and seeking forgiveness. And doing so is not merely with the tongue; rather it (repentance) should be done with the tongue, heart and with our actions. We should correct our actions. Verily repentance only with the tongue has no value. Due to this, some of the Salaf used to say: "Verily our repentance is in need of repentance"
Why? Because this was only done with the tongue, and indeed this is evil. Repenting only on one's tongue is evil and dangerous. Therefore, if one does such an act, he needs to repent once more.

Upon a Muslim is to sincerely repent to Allah with one's heart. One should struggle with himself, monitor his actions, and look at them. That which is good, he should praise Allah for allowing him to do such good deeds, and he should increase in doing them. But that which is evil, the performer of those deeds should repent to Allah and seek His forgiveness; he should also stop those action and distance himself from them. As long as one is still alive, then he has the ability to do so, and he has the ability to repent and act, but once death approaches, then everything stops, as The Messenger (sallAllahu alayhi wa salem) said:

"If the child of Adam (mankind) dies, all of his actions stop except three..."

And once his time (death) has come, and the Angel of death rears, then repentance will not be accepted. The Messenger (sallAllahu alayhi wa salem) said:

"Allah accepts repentance as long as death has not approached"

Meaning: As long as the soul has not reached the throat. Once this takes place and nothing remains except the Angels pulling the soul from the body, at this moment Allah will no longer accept repentance. If it was accepted at this moment, then everyone would repent, even this disbeliever would repent at this moment, and the sinner also, but it is no longer accepted. Repentence has its specified time, which is before the approaching of death. And at this time a person still can think and reflect and knows that he/she has neglected his life, but he can no longer repent, and even if he were to repent with his tongue at that time, it would not be accepted from him. (In the ayat mentioned at the beginning of this talk) They will say:

{Oh our Lord, return us in order that we may do righteous actions!}

But this request will not be fulfilled.

Therefore, it is upon a Muslim to be aware of this matter, and reflect over the quick passing of days and nights. We have witnessed the passing of the first 10 days of Ramadan, at this point we should judge ourselves. What have we put forward in these 10 days?! And what have we left from that which we should have put forward?! We should judge ourselves and focus on the middle 10 days and the last 10 before those pass us as well and we waste this great month. Upon us is to judge and monitor ourselves. We should think about our direction, we should look at our faults. If you were to in fact count your evil deeds, you would not be able to count them all. There is no change nor might except with Allah. And if you were to count your good deeds, you would find that they are low in number and weak. Therefore, upon you is to repent to Allah. You need to repent! You need to seek forgiveness! You need to correct your actions! You need this life, it should not pass without benefit! This is your main source of wealth, your main wealth is not money because that will pass and end, rather your main source of wealth is your life and time in this life. This is your correct wealth, so preserve it and be diligent in increasing it and profiting. Verily this is the means of happiness or sadness on The Day of Judgment.

"A person's feet will not be moved on The Day of Judgment until he/she is asked about 4: His life, what did he do with it..."

Allah says:

{Did we not give them a life, where in it, the could have reflected, and reminders (Prophets and Messengers) came to them. Then taste the punishment, and the wrong doers will not have a helper}

Allah said in that verse: Did we not give you a life span? Allah gave you this life not for you to play, eat and enjoy like the animals. Rather, He gave you this life to work in it and with it. He gave it to you in order for you to work for your next life, and if you don't do so, it will be a means of torment against you on The Day of Judgment.

The Prophet continued to say in the aforementioned hadeeth:

"...and about his youth, what did you spend it doing, and about his wealth, where did he obtain it, and what did he spend it on, and about his knowledge, what did he do with it"

You will be asked about these 4 things on The Day of Judgment, so what will your answer be?!
In this life you were informed about these questions, so it is upon you to work for the answers and prepare them before you are asked. Children in school are taught the curriculums and they are informed that they will be questioned about what they learned, and as a result, the students study the materials word for word, they turn the pages and make certain they know the answers, and they prepare for the test, and this is in this life. But as for the next life and its test, rarely do you find a person preparing and focusing on it, except for those whom Allah has given success.

We ask Allah to make us and you from those who act for their hereafter and from those who make their religion sincerely for Him, and those who repent from their sins, and those who race toward good deeds before the ending of their lives and before the ending of their hours.

May the peace and blessings of Allah be upon our Prophet Muhammad, and upon his family and companions.

Translated by Mustafa George

Prayer and its effect on Purifying the Soul

noreply@blogger.com (Relief) — Wed, 11 Jul 2007 23:22:00 +0000

by Hussain al-Awaa'ishah

Allaah the Sublime said: Indeed prayer restrains from the obscene and evil deeds.[ 1]

Allaah has explained in this verse that a correct prayer, performed with khushoo' undoubtedly prevents its performer from obscene and evil deeds and leads him to goodness. Therefore, you will see that the people of the mosque are the most superior of mankind and the best amongst them. The sins and shortcomings of others are many times more than the sins and shortcomings of these people.

If the prayer does not prevent us from obscene and evil deeds then it is necessary to carefully scrutinize the deficiency within it and to correct it. There is no escaping from correcting one's prayer and there is no fleeing from bringing about khushoo' within it. So let us look at the causes and let us strive to treat them with the cure. Just like we treat our bodies for their diseases, the treatment of the souls is more appropriate and comes first. And this is what will help us to understand the saying of the Messenger (sallallaahu alaihi wasallam): "The first thing for which a servant will be held to account for is his prayer. If it is correct and sound, all the rest of his actions will be correct and sound and if it is corrupt then all the rest of his actions will be corrupt."[2]

So in the correction of the prayer lies the corection of all the other actions. The position of the prayer (relative to all the other actions) is like that of the head to the body. This is because the servant is nearest to his Lord during his prayer, he calls upon his Lord and seeks forgiveness from Him. He returns to Allaah and cries to Him, the Sublime.

The prayer cannot be corrected except with the correction of the aqeedah (belief), being observant of Allaah, having fear of Him, bringing oneself to account in front of Him, and trembling out of fear of His Fire. When he finishes his prayer and is put to trial with sins and disobedience, he finds strength in his heart to repel them. This is because he looks at the the temporary and vanishing pleasures and then at the bliss and joy which never ends and the happiness which is never cut off. So he puts the good which will remain (and last forever) ahead of that which is only transitory and vanishes.

The prayer of the servant is corrupted due to lack of the careful observance of Allaah and weakness in taqwaa[3]. He is, therefore, not able to produce such awe which will come in between him and his acts of disobedience.

There also occurs in the hadeeth: "Indeed there is in the body a morsel of flesh which if it be sound and wholesome, the whole body will be sound and wholesome and which if it be corrupt, the whole body will be corrupt. Indeed it is the heart."[4]

In the correction and purification of the heart lies the correction of the whole body and in the corruption of the heart lies the corruption of the whole body. If the heart is corrected, the hand will be corrected so that it does not steal or strike anyone or commit zina by touching what is unlawful. The feet will also be corrected so that they do not walk towards what is unlawful. The ears will be put straight so that they do not listen to musical instruments, slander or backbiting. The situation of the tongue will improve so that it does not speak except what is good. If the heart is corrupted, the whole body becomes corrupt and the limbs will not depart except towards evil conduct and mischief.

The matter of the heart is either set aright or corrupted by the prayer. If the prayer is good it is an indication that the heart has benefitted and that it is sound and wholesome. If it is not good, it is an indication of the heart receiving little benefit and of its corruption. Evil deeds then become manifest and overtake the limbs.

Know that every prayer which is performed with awe and humility enlivens the heart and stimulates it to do good deeds and also makes it adapt to good deeds, just as every good action which is performed outside of the prayer increases ones khushoo within the prayer. In a hadeeth there occurs: "Upon you is the Night Prayer (Tahajjud) as it was the habit of the righteous people before you, is a means of nearness to Allaah the Exalted, a prevention from evil deeds and an expiation for sins."[5]

The Messenger (sallallaahu alaihi wasallam) has made it clear that the Night Prayer is a prevention from sins in that it stops the one who performs it from evil deeds and incites him to do good deeds. Therefore, it is necessary for us to establish the prayer and to increase in it and likewise we must perform the Night Prayer, standing awe-struck, humble and submissive to Allaah the Sublime. Our hearts weeping over what we have neglected and fallen short of while hoping for the mercy of our Lord. We seek nearness to him by calling Him by His Names and Attributes, asking Him by them that he establishes us (upon His path) and that He gives us benefit from our prayer and standing at night.

Life's Index Cards

noreply@blogger.com (Relief) — Tue, 29 May 2007 02:24:00 +0000

By Zahra Duran

In that place between wakefulness and dreams, I found myself in a room. There were no distinguishing features save for the one wall covered with small index cards files. They were like the ones in libraries that list titles by author or subject in alphabetical order. But these files, which stretched from floor to ceiling and seemingly endlessly in either direction, had very different headings. As I drew near the wall of files, the first to catch my attention was one that read "People I Have Liked." I opened it and began flipping through the cards. I quickly shut it, shocked to realize that I recognized the names written on each one.

And then without being told, I knew exactly where I was.

This lifeless room with its small files was a crude catalog system for my life. Here were written the actions of my every moment, big and small, in detail my memory couldn't match. A sense of wonder and curiousity, coupled with horror, stirred within me as I began randomly opening files and exploring their content. Some bought joy and sweet memories others a sense of shame and regret so intense that I would look over my shoulder to see if anyone was watching.

A filed named "Friends" was next to one marked "Friends I Have Betrayed." The titles ranged from the mundane to the outright weird. "Books I have Read", "Lies I Have Told", "Comfort I Have Given", "Jokes I Have Laughed At." Some were hilarious in their exactness: "Things I've Yelled at My Brothers". Others I couldn't laugh at: "Things I Have Done in My Anger", "Things I Have Muttered Under My Breath at My Parents". I never ceased to be surprised by the contents. Often there were many more cards then I expected. Sometimes fewer than I hoped.

I was overwhelmed by the sheer volume of the life I had lived. Could it be possible that I had the time in my 30 years to write each of these thousands or even millions of cards? But each card confirmed this truth. Each was written in my own handwriting. Each signed with my signature.

When I pulled out the file marked "Songs I have Listened To", I realized the files grew to contain their contents. The cards were packed tightly, and yet after two or three yards, I hadn't found the end of the file. I shut it, shamed, not so much by the quality of music, but more by the vast amount of time I knew that file represented.

When I came to a file marked "Lustful Thoughts", I felt a chill run through my body. I pulled the file out only an inch, not willing to test its size, and drew out a card. I shuddered at its detailed content. I felt sick to think that such a moment had been recorded.

An almost animal rage broke on me. One thought dominated my mind: "No one must ever see these cards! No one must ever see this room! I have to destroy them!" In an insane frenzy I yanked the file out. Its size didn't matter now. I had to empty it and burn the cards. But as I took it at one end and began pounding it on the floor, I could not dislodge a single card. I became desperate and pulled out a card, only to find it as strong as steel when I tried to tear it. Defeated and utterly helpless, I returned the file to its slot. Leaning my forehead against the wall, I let out a long, self-pitying sigh.

And then I saw it.

The title bore "People that I Have Taught About Allah." The handle was brighter than those around it, newer, almost unused. I pulled on its handle and a small box not more than three inches long fell into my hands. I could count the cards it contained on one hand.

And then the tears came. I began to weep. Sobs so deep that the hurt started in my stomach and shook through me. I fell on my knees and cried. I cried out of shame, from the overwhelming shame of it all. The rows of file shelves swirled in my tear-filled eyes. No one must ever, ever know of this room.

I must lock it up and hide the key.

************

All that is on earth will perish
But will abide (forever) the face
Of thy Lord, full of Majesty, Bounty
and Honor.
Then which of the favors of your Lord will you deny

Reliance on Allah

noreply@blogger.com (Relief) — Thu, 12 Apr 2007 20:36:00 +0000

The Meaning of Reliance (Tawakkul) on Allaah
AUTHOR:
Shaikh Saalih bin Fawzaan Al-Fawzaan

SOURCE:
Haqeeqat-ut-Tawakkul ‘alaAllaah (pg. 7-14)

PRODUCED BY:
Al-Ibaanah.com

All praise be to Allaah, Lord of the all that exists, and may Allaah send His peace and praises on His Messenger, our Prophet Muhammad, as well as on all of his family members and Companions, and those who follow his guidance, tread his methodology and adhere to his Sunnah until the Day of Recompense.

To Proceed: Relying on Allaah (tawakkul) is one of the greatest forms of worship. Allaah says: “So upon Allaah, put your trust if you are truly believers.” [Surah Al-Maa’idah: 23] So He made relying upon Allaah (tawakkul) a condition for Eemaan (Faith). Allaah said to His Prophet: “So when you have made a decision, then put your trust in Allaah.” [Surah Aali ‘Imraan: 159] So He ordered His Prophet to put his trust and reliance on Allaah. Allaah says: “O Prophet! Allaah is sufficient for you and for the believers who follow you.” [Surah Al-Anfaal: 64] And He says: “And whoever is dutiful to Allaah, He makes a way out for him (from every difficulty). And He will provide for him from places he never could imagine. And whoever puts his trust in Allaah, He will suffice him. Verily, Allaah will accomplish His purpose. Indeed, Allaah has set a measure for all things.” [Surah At-Talaaq: 2-3] And He says: “And whoever is dutiful to Allaah, He will make his matter easy for him. That is the Command of Allaah, which He has sent down to you. And whoever fears Allaah and keeps his duty to Him, He will expiate from him his sins and enlarge his reward.” [Surah At-Talaaq: 4-5]

Furthermore, Allaah has linked this reliance (tawakkul) to worship ( ‘ibaadah), as occurs in His statement: “So worship Him and put your trust in Him.” [Surah Hood: 123] Allaah orders us to put our trust in Him, and He praises those who do it. He also states in many verses of the Qur’aan that He loves those who put their reliance in Him. All of this indicates and shows the importance of putting one’s trust in Allaah. Relying upon Allaah is from the actions of the heart – so it is an act of worship of the heart. Therefore, putting one’s trust in Allaah is not to be done with one’s limbs and body parts. Rather, it is found in the heart, just like fear (khawf), awe (khashyah), longing (raghbah), dreading (rahbah) and dutifulness (taqwaa) of Allaah – all of these are acts of worship of the heart. The position of tawakkul (reliance on Allaah) is as some of the scholars have stated: “The position of tawakkul in the Religion is like that of the head on a body.” So a person that does not have tawakkul does not have Religion, just like a body that has no head. It is well known that if a body is missing its head, it will cease to live. This is the same case with the Religion – if it lacks tawakkul, it lacks correctness – meaning that one will not have a correct religion. Therefore, relying on Allaah has a great standing amongst the stations of servitude to Allaah. Allaah uses it to distinguish His believing servants from everyone else. So whoever doesn’t put his trust in Allaah at all is a disbeliever. And whoever puts his trust in Allaah and also on others besides Allaah (at the same time) is a polytheist. And as for the one who puts his trust in Allaah alone – he is a monotheistic believer whom Allaah loves and whose actions and statements He is pleased with.

This is since he has established his actions and statements upon a correct foundation. So what is the meaning of this tawakkul (reliance on Allaah), which holds such importance and high position in the Religion? The Meaning of Reliance (Tawakkul) on Allaah Tawakkul on Allaah means: Entrusting one’s affairs to Him and relying on Him in all matters. Entrusting one’s affairs to Allaah entails not turning to someone else for support. So reliance (tawakkul) upon Allaah can be with regard to matters of Creed, such that the servant’s heart does not turn to anyone else besides Allaah. Therefore, he is always putting his reliance in Allaah, entrusting all of his affairs to Him. The pagans did not fall into polytheism and disbelief except due to the fact that they put their reliance in other than Allaah, entrusted their affairs to other than Him, and believed in their hearts that someone besides Allaah was able to grant their requests, alleviate their worries and repel harms from them. So they relied on statues, idols, trees, stones, graves, shrines and the deceased. They put their trust in created beings to grant them things that only Allaah could do. So they began to ask them for help, offer sacrifices to them, make oaths to them, and direct various forms of worship to them. This is since they have relied on them apart from Allaah, thinking that they have the power to benefit them, harm them or grant their requests. Due to this, when they put their reliance in other than Allaah and directed their beliefs and worship to other than Him, they disbelieved in Him. The foundation of Shirk is: Entrusting one’s affairs and putting one’s reliance on other than Allaah. This is why Allaah says: “So upon Allaah, put your trust if you are truly believers.” [Surah Al-Maa’idah: 23] The scholars say: The object of the verb here “upon Allaah” denotes limitedness. Thus the ayah means: “Put your trust in Allaah alone and not anyone else.” So Allaah has restricted tawakkul to Himself alone apart from others. Upon Allaah” means not upon anyone else. The ayah continues: “…put your trust if you are truly believers.”

Allaah has made tawakkul (reliance on Allaah) here a sign of one’s Faith in Him and proof of one’s Tawheed. As for the one who claims to be a believer and an adherent of Tawheed, but yet then goes on to put his trust in other than Allaah, such as stones, trees, statues, graves, the deceased, and so on, then this person’s claim is false. And he is not a believer since he has entrusted his affairs to someone besides Allaah. Likewise, one can put his trust in Allaah in order to achieve his worldly needs, such as obtaining provision, preventing an enemy, and repelling harms and dangers from himself. Therefore, relying upon Allaah can be in religious matters as well as worldly matters. So you should rely on Allaah in your Creed and your Tawheed. And put your trust in Allaah for fulfilling your needs even if your needs are of a worldly nature, such as eating, drinking, clothing and accomplishing some set goals. Put your reliance and trust in Allaah for all matters. Reliance on Allaah is not limited to just matters of Creed and Tawheed. Rather, it even applies to worldly matters and seeking provision. When it comes to fulfilling any goal, do not rely on anyone besides Allaah. This is since all of the affairs are in the Hand of Allaah. The keys of the heavens and the earth are in His Hand, so we must put our trust and reliance in Him.

All of the needs and objectives of the servants lie in the Hand of Allaah. So how can a person put his trust and reliance in other than Allaah for his religious and worldly matters? No doubt this is from ignorance and turning away from Allaah. Therefore, relying on Allaah is one of the greatest stations of servitude.

Published: April 1, 2006

Post Natal Illness

noreply@blogger.com (Relief) — Thu, 05 Apr 2007 05:24:00 +0000

Symptoms of Post Natal IllnessThese symptoms can be very different for everyone.
There are too many symptoms to list all but they can include:

Panic attacks and anxiety
Feeling physically ill and having physical symptoms that are
unusual for you such as chest pains, breathing problems,
headaches, dizziness, many minor illnesses and stomach upsets.

Worrying constantly about the health of yourself your baby, other
children or family and friends

Obsessive thoughts or repetitive, chanting thoughts or voices

Thoughts that you will harm your child or another member of
your family either accidentally or deliberately.

Fear or thoughts that you may sexually or physically abuse either
your newest baby or your other children

Many women with PNI describe a feeling of having 'fuggy' vision
or a 'mussy' head.

Having worries that everyday objects such as knives, stairs, play
equipment, even your car or bus are dangerous and could harm
your child yourself or your family

Having 'what if' thoughts about what could happen if they did

Feelings that you are a 'bad' mother or a 'bad' person

Obsessions about either your own health, your child/rens or
partners - fears that you or they will die

A constant feeling of doom or dread - as if something really
horrible will happen any minute

Having a constant need to discuss and revisit the birth because it
was so horrible and you felt things to be out of control

Or not being able to think or talk about the birth

A feeling of great sadness and a feeling that since the baby, life is
not worth living and nothing gives you joy, not even your new
baby

A feeling that if you just disappeared out of your families life
everything would be OK for them - that you causing your family
unhappiness by just being around

A feeling of numbness and lack of emotion - which also might
extend to a lack of feeling for your baby

Hiding how you feel and putting on a 'brave face'..

Actual self harm or feeling you would like to harm yourself that
you either never felt or did before or has come back.

Difficulty getting to sleep or waking up in a panic or feeling ill -
either in the night or early in the morning.

Feeling overwhelmingly tired all the time even when you do get
enough sleep

Drinking too much and/or abuse of recreational or prescription drugs

Use Medicines that are Not Against Islam

noreply@blogger.com (Relief) — Mon, 19 Feb 2007 02:44:00 +0000

Shaykh `Abd al-`Azeez ibn Baaz (may Allaah have mercy on him)
concerning mental illness & medication said:

It is permissible to treat sickness according to scholarly
consensus. The Muslim may go to a doctor for internal sickness,
injuries, nervous problems and so on, for him to diagnose his
sickness and treat it appropriately, using medicines that are
permitted according to Islam, according to his medical knowledge,
because this comes under the heading of taking the usual means, and
it does not contradict the idea of putting one's trust in Allaah.
Allaah has sent down the disease and He has sent down the cure;
those who know it know it, and those who do not know it do not know
it, but Allaah does not put the healing for His slaves in something
that He has forbidden to them.

It is not permissible for a sick person to go to the soothsayers or
fortunetellers who claim to have knowledge of the unseen, in order
to find out from them what his sickness is. Nor is it permissible
for him to believe what they tell him, for they speak without
knowledge or they summon the jinn to ask their help in doing what
they want to do. The ruling on these people is that they are kaafirs
who are misguided, if they claim to have knowledge of the unseen…
Majmoo' Fataawa al-Shaykh Ibn Baaz, 3/274

The scholars of the Standing Committee said, answering a similar
question:

Trust in Allaah and think positively of Him; delegate your affairs
to Him, and do not despair of His mercy, bounty and kindness, for He
has not sent down any disease but He has also sent down the cure.
You should take the means and continue to consult specialist doctors
who have knowledge of disease and its treatment. Recite Soorat al-
Ikhlaas, Soorat al-Falaq and Soorat al-Naas over yourself three
times, and blow into your hands after each time, and wipe your face
and whatever you can reach of your body. Do that repeatedly night
and day and when going to sleep. Also recite over yourself Soorat al-
Faatihah at any time of night or day, and recite Aayat al-Kursiy
when you lie in your bed at night. These are the best ruqyahs with
which a person may treat himself and protect himself from evil. Call
upon Allaah by reciting the du'aa' for one who is in distress, and
say:

"Laa ilaaha ill-Allaah al-`Azeem al-Haleem, laa ilaaha ill-Allaah
rabb al-`arsh il-`azeem, laa ilaaha ill-Allaah rabb al-samawaati wa
rabb al-ard wa rabb al-`arsh il-`azeem (There is no god but Allaah,
the All-Mighty, the Forbearing, there is no god but Allaah, the Lord
of the mighty Throne, there is no god but Allaah, Lord of the
heavens, Lord of the earth, and Lord of the mighty Throne)."
Also treat yourself with the ruqyah of the Messenger of Allaah
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him):

Allaahumma Rabb an-naas, mudhhib al-ba's ishfi anta al-Shaafi, laa
shaafiya illa anta, shifaa'an laa yughaadir saqaman (O Allaah, Lord
of mankind, the One Who relieves hardship, grant healing, for there
is no healer but You, a healing that leaves no trace of sickness)
And recite other dhikrs and ruqyahs and du'aa's which are mentioned
in the books of hadeeth, and which are mentioned by al-Nawawi in
Riyaadh al-Saaliheen and Kitaab al-Adhkaar.
Fataawa al-Lajnah al-Daa'imah, 1/297

The Reward for Khushoo' and Beautification of the Prayer

noreply@blogger.com (Relief) — Sun, 18 Feb 2007 00:48:00 +0000

Author: Hussain al-Awaa'ishah
Source: As-Salaat Wa Atharuhaa (trans. Abu Iyaad 1995)
Article ID : IBD060009 [5106]

Uqbah bin Aamir (ra) said: The Messenger of Allaah (sallallaahu alaihi wasallam) said: "There is no person who performs wudhoo, beautifying his wudhoo, then prays two rakahs concentrating therein with this heart and face except Paradise becomes obligatory for him."[1]

Zaid bin Khaalid al-Juhnee (ra) said: The Messenger of Allaah (sallallaahu alaihi wasallam) said: "Whoever performed wudhoo and beautified the wudhoo, then prayed two rakahs, not being forgetful in them all his previous sins will be forgiven."[2]

Humraan, the servant of Uthmaan bin Affaan (ra) said: I saw Uthmaan bin Affaan (ra) call for wudhoo (i.e. a container of water). He poured water over his hands and washed them three times. Then he put his right hand into the container and rinsed his mouth, and washed his nose by putting water in it and then blew the water out. Then he washed his face and forearms up to the elbows three times, passed his wet hands over his head and washed his feet up to the ankles three times. Then he said: I saw the Messenger of Allaah (sallallaahu alaihi wasallam) perform wudhoo like this wudhoo of mine and then he (sallallaahu alaihi wasallam) said: "If anyone performs wudhoo like this wudhoo then prays two rakahs, without conversing with his soul (i.e. not thinking of anything else) all his past sins will be forgiven."[3]

Abu Dardaa (ra) said: I heard the Messenger of Allaah (sallallaahu alaihi wasallam) say: "Whoever performs ablution and beautifies it, then stands and prays two rakahs - or four, Sahl (a subnarrator) is not sure - beautifying them with dhikr and khushoo and then seeks forgivesness from Allaah, will be forgiven."[4]

And at the end of the hadeeth of Amr bin Asabah (ra): "... If he stands and prays, praises Allaah, glorifies Him, extolls Him with that which He is worthy of and empties his heart for Allaah the Exalted alone, he will depart from his sins in the same condition as the day his mother gave birth to him."[5]

Jaabir (ra) said: I asked the Messenger of Allaah (sallallaahu alaihi wasallam) about wiping the pebbles during prayer. He said: "Only once, but if you withold from doing that it is better for you than a hundred black-eyed she-camels."[6]

NOTES [1] Reported by Muslim
[2] Saheeh ut-Targheeb wat-Tarheeb, no. 223.
[3] Reported by Bukhaaree, Muslim and others.
[4] Reported by Ahmad with a Hasan isnaad.
[5] Reported by Muslim and see [Saheeh ut-Targheeb wat-Tarheeb], no. 392.
[6] Reported by Ibn Khuzaimah in his [Saheeh] it is also in [Saheeh ut-Targheeb wat-Tarheeb], no. 558.

The Benefits of Prayer

noreply@blogger.com (Relief) — Sun, 11 Feb 2007 22:32:00 +0000

Source: Ibn Qayyim al-Jawziyyah [d.751]

- 1 - Prayer is something that causes one to receive sustenance.

- 2 - It is something that safeguards one's physical health.

- 3 - It keeps away harmful things.

- 4 - It casts away illnesses.

- 5 - It strengthens the heart.

- 6 - It brightens one's countenance.

- 7 - It delights the soul.

- 8 - It gets rid of laziness.

- 9 - It makes the limbs active.

- 10 - It increases one's physical strength.

- 11 - It expands the chest (making one at ease and giving him insight).

- 12 - It is nourishment for the soul.

- 13 - It illuminates the heart.

- 14 - It safeguards one's blessings.

- 15 - It repels catastrophes.

- 16 - It brings on blessings.

- 17 - It keeps away the Shaytaan (the Devil).

- 18 - It draws one close to Ar-Rahmaan (Allaah, the Most Merciful).

And overall it has an amazing effect on the health of the body and heart, and in strengthening them and expelling harmful pollutants from them. No two people have been afflicted with any disability, disease, or other calamity, except that the portion of the one who prays is less and his outcome is cleaner.

Also, prayer has an amazing effect on the evils of the dunyaa (the worldly life) and how it repels them, especially when the prayer is performed properly and completely, inwardly and outwardly. Nothing keeps the evils of the dunyaa at bay and brings on the benefits of it like prayer.

Being Justly Balanced

noreply@blogger.com (Relief) — Mon, 05 Feb 2007 01:16:00 +0000

From Abu Hurairah (radiyallaahu 'anhu) who said that Allaah's Messenger (salallaahu 'alaihi wa'sallam) said: Love the one whom you love to a certain degree (moderately), perhaps one day he will be someone for whom you have hatred, and hate the one for whom you have hatred to a certain degree (moderately), perhaps one day he will be one whom you love.

Reported by at-Tirmidhee (no. 1997) and others by way of Suwayd ibn 'Amr al-Kalbee: Hammad ibn Salamah narrated to us from Ayyoob as-Sakhtiyanee from Muhammad ibn Seereen from him. This isnaad is Saheeh (authentic) if Allaah wills.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
NOTES
The Muslim is justly balanced in his loving and his hating. He is just both when giving and when taking and is moderate in all of that. His being justly balanced is one of the signs of his Religion and the Sharee'ah. So he is not one who goes beyond the limits, nor one who falls short of what is required. Furthermore the Muslim does not derive this quality of being justly balanced from his intellect and desires, nor from his own opinion or other than this, rather he takes it from the Book of Allaah, the One free of all imperfections. "Thus we have made you a justly balanced nation, that you be witnesses over mankind and the Messenger (Muhammad (salallaahu 'alaihi wa'sallam)) be a witness over you." (Soorah al-Baqarah (2): 143). Being justly balanced is not an easy matter, indeed many of those who call out and declare it, desire only to water matters down and compromise. So for a person to be truly justly balanced as ordered by Allaah is not, as I have said, easy.

Prayer to Ease Anxiety and Depression

noreply@blogger.com (Relief) — Wed, 17 Jan 2007 13:15:00 +0000

Explanation from Imam Ibn Al-Qayyim al-Jawziyya

It was reported from ‘Abd-Allaah ibn Mas’ood that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “No person suffers any anxiety or grief, and says:

‘Allaahumma innee ‘abduka wa ibn ‘abdika wa ibn amatika, naasiyati bi yadika, maadin fiyya hukmuka, ‘adlun fiyya qadaa’uka, as’aluka bi kulli ismin huwa laka sammayta bihi nafsaka aw anzaltahu fi kitaabika aw ‘allamtahu ahadan min khalqika aw ista’tharta bihi fi ‘ilm il-ghaybi ‘andak an taj’ala al-Qur’aana rabee’ qalbi wa noor sadri wa jalaa’a huzni wa dhahaaba hammi (O Allaah, I am Your slave, son of Your slave, son of Your female slave, my forelock is in Your hand, Your command over me is forever executed and Your decree over me is just. I ask You by every Name belonging to You which You named Yourself with, or revealed in Your Book, or You taught to any of Your creation, or You have preserved in the knowledge of the unseen with You, that You make the Qur’aan the life of my heart and the light of my breast, and a departure for my sorrow and a release for my anxiety)’ - but Allaah will take away his sorrow and grief, and give him in their stead joy.”(Ahmad 1/391 and Al-Albaanee declared it sahih.)

Imam Ibn Qayyim Al-Jawziyya said about this dua in his book 'The Provisions of the Hereafter' that the verse, "Lord: I am Thy servant, whose father and mother are thy servants..." embodies the core of knowledge and recognition of Allah Almighty, and the secrets of worship, and no single book can ever detail their full meaning. Yet, this prayer is full of recognition of who is God, and in it, the worshipper calling upon His Lord, acknowledges his Creator, and presents himself as Allah's servant, and the son of His servants. The caller also places things where they belong by recognizing that his fate is in Allah's Hand; that his destiny is moving according to the divine plan; that Allah Almighty does whatever He pleases with it; that the servant can neither bring benefits nor harm to himself; that he cannot bring about his own birth, death, or resurrection; that his destiny is in Allah's Hand; that he has no power to alter it except as Allah wills; that he is totally dependent on his Creator, Cherisher, Sustainer, and Lord; that his own existence is subject to whatever Allah Almighty decrees; and that Allah is just, and what He wills shall be.

Imam Ibn Qayyim Al-Jawziyya then explains the next part of the dua: "My fate is in Thy Hand, and my destiny is moving according to Thy plan. Thou art indeed just in Thy judgment..."This section of the prayer embodies two cardinal aspects which are the core of the doctrine of monotheism (Tawheed): (1) the first is the recognition and confirmation of fate, and that Allah's decree regarding His servant shall unfailingly come into force, and that the servant cannot escape it or repel it; and (2) the second aspect proclaims that Allah is just, that He does not oppress His servants, and that what He decrees is due by virtue of divine justice and knowledge of such needs. This is because injustice represents the need, ignorance, incompetence, weakness, and inferiority of an unjust person, and therefore, such attributes are not divine, and they cannot come from one who is omniscient, All-Knowing, wise, and has no needs. Hence, Allah's wisdom is operative wherever His will is ordained. Allah is rich beyond any need, and everything is poor and seeks its nourishment from Him. He is All-Wise, and there is not a single atom throughout the entire universes where His will is not operative. The absolute dependence of each and every cell in the entire creation, and their soliciting of their support and sustenance from the sole and only provider requires their gratitude. Hence gratitude (shukur) is rewarded with blessings and ingratitude (kufr) is rewarded with disapprobation and consequent punishment for the non repenting ones.

When the unrepenting and ungrateful disbelievers and idol worshipers threatened Allah's Prophet Hud, peace be upon him, to invoke the curse of their deities upon him, he replied: I call Allah to witness and you bear witness that I am innocent regarding what you ascribe as partners to Him. Therefore, scheme (Your worst) against me and grant me no respite. I put my trust in Allah, my Lord and your Lord. There is not a moving creature whose forelock is not (held firmly) in His Hand. My Lord is surely on a straight path, (Qur'an 11:54-56)--meaning that Allah's power which is unlimited and unrestrained is operative over all creatures, and no one can withstand His decree. He alone has the power to move them as He pleases, and He does so rightly, justly, wisely and mercifully.

In this prayer, the servants proclamation: "My destiny is moving according to Thy plan," means the same as 'There is not a moving creature whose forelock is not (held firmly) in His Hand,' and his saying: "Thou art indeed just in Thy judgment, " is also parallel to 'My lord is surely on a straight path.' Furthermore, Allah's Messenger (pbuh) calls in this prayer upon Allah's most holy Names and the divine attribute He proclaimed in His kingdom, revealed in a Book, taught to a privileged servant or kept as His sole secret, so that no angel of the nearest and most exalted status and no prophet or messenger has ever known to ask by it. Such invocation surpasses all supplications, and of all prayers is the dearest to Him, and most worthy of immediate reply, because it proves the servant's knowledge and recognition of his Lord.

Allah's messenger (pbuh) then prayed to Allah Almighty to make the glorious Qur'an the prime of his heart, meaning the spiritual food of his body, mind, and soul, and through it, to wash away, dispel, and cure his stresses, worries, and concerns, making it the one conclusive medicine that will extract illnesses, and restore the human being to his true status and balance. Hence, he asked his Lord to make the Qur'an the light of his soul that removes any corrosion that tarnishes his clarity and wisdom, and that polishes his heart. Such medicine works only if the patient is truthful in his asking for it, sincere in his trust in its effectiveness and uses it as prescribed by his physician. Hence, Allah willing the correct use of the medicine will certainly be followed by complete recovery, excellent health and vitality and Allah is the Supreme helper.

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About Imam Ibn Al-Qayyim Al-Jawziyya

His full name is Muhammad ibn Abi Bakr, son of Ayyoub, son of Sa'ad al-Zar'i, al-Dimashqi, patronymed as Abu 'Abdullaah Shamsu-Deen, and known as Ibn al-Qaqqim al-Jawziyaa. He was born in Damascus, Syria in 691 A.H. and he studied under his father who was the local attendant of al-Jawziyya school. He also studied under the great Imam and scholar Imam Taqiyyu-Deen Ahmad ibn Taimiyyah who kept him as his closest student and disciple, and Ibn Al-Qayyim later became his successor.

Ibn al-Qayyim catered to all the branches of Islamic sciences and was particularly known and commended for his commentaries on the Qur'an, hadiths, and fiqh.

Tips for Reducing and Controlling Stress

noreply@blogger.com (Relief) — Sat, 13 Jan 2007 03:34:00 +0000

Be Realistic: If you are feeling overwhelmed, learn to say no to any activity that is not absolutely necessary.
Pray and make the dua of the distressed regularly: Just take time in your prayers and reflect, say the supplications for the morning and the evening every day and believe that you will get better.
Exercise: physical activity may relieve stres. Be sure to talk with your doctor before beginning any exercise program to ensure that you are able to do what is required physically.
Enjoy Hobbies: Take a break by gardening, reading a good book, sitting outdoors, or enjoying some other hobby.
Practice a healthy lifestyle: focus on good nutrition, limiting caffeine and sugar, getting sufficient rest but not too much, exercise, and balance work and play.
Share your feelings: Stay in touch with friends and family. Don't try to cope alone. If you don't have any friends then try to join an online support group or talk to someone in your community about any community social groups you can join.