Premenstrual Syndrome—Changing Your Eating Habits

Premenstrual syndrome is a tricky thing to diagnose. Some of the symptoms overlap with other illnesses, such as depression, bipolar, etc. that it is often hard for even your physician to pinpoint the root cause of your illness. Dr. Katherine Dalton, a leading pioneer in the field of PMS research, provides a handy chart to help distinguish between PMS related depression and depressive illness, in her book, ‘The PMS Bible’. This is not a hard and fast chart, but generally those with PMS related depression have different symptoms than those with depressive illness.



PMS Depression Depressive Illness

Duration 14 days of cycle Weeks or years
Irritability always present may be absent
Sleep yearning to stay in bed early-morning waking
Appetite increased absent
Weight gain loss
Libido may increase absent


Depressive illness can be an emotional reaction to something tragic happening or it can also be an illness and affect bodily function as well. The symptoms are similar to PMS depression but there are differences in the timings. With depressive illness the symptoms are present day after day and may last for weeks, months, or even years. In PMS depression, the symptoms do not last longer than 14 days each monthly cycle. After menses the woman returns back to her normal self, only to revert back to the PMS right after ovulation. In addition, with PMS depression, woman normally experience a pronounced irritability that is not common with depressive illness. A patient experience a depressive illness may be too apathetic or lethargic to show any irritability even when it may be justified.

Dr. Dalton has determined that PMS sufferers undergo a drop in blood sugar levels which causes a release of adrenaline. In her book, ‘The PMS Bible’, Dr. Dalton discusses how a drop in blood sugar levels causes a release in adrenaline, which automatically moves sugar from cells into blood, raising the blood sugar level. This is a way that Allah ensured that our blood sugar level remains within optimal limits.

Research has shown that the progesterone level of women drop after eating a large meal. This helps to support the need for women with PMS to eat smaller amounts at each meal, and also to eat more often.

The first priority is to make sure that there is no drop in the blood-sugar level, which would normally occur when there has been a long interval between meals. Men can usually go eight hours without food as they are gorgers but for healthy women the interval is shorter, averaging at 5 hours. Women who suffer from PMS need to eat every three hours to help relieve the symptoms of PMS. Normally woman who suffer from PMS, need this 3 hour diet in addition to any other treatment they are on, such as progesterone therapy, or herbal treatment.

The guidelines for the three hourly starch diet are as follows:

Take the day’s allotment of starchy food and divide it up so that you are able to eat small starchy snacks every 3 hours during the waking hours and within one hour of waking and retiring to bed. Starchy foods are foods that contain flour, potatoes, oats, rice, rye, and sweet corn. At the same time, continue with a healthy diet with sufficient protein and lots of fruit and vegetables.

3 hourly starch diet rules:

1. Eat small starchy snacks every 3 hours during waking hours.

2. Eat a starchy snack within an hour of awakening from sleep.

3. Eat a starchy snack within an hour of going to bed.

4. Eat the starch diet throughout the menstrual cycle.

5. Maintain a healthy, varied, and nutritious diet.

The bottom line is that research has shown that PMS sufferers have problems going long intervals without food, especially during the premenstruum, which is the time from ovulation until you menstruate. If they do go without food for long intervals they may get faint, excessively tired, panicky or irritable. They also tend to suffer from uncontrollable premenstrual food cravings and binges, especially when they have been dieting or not eating for long periods.

If you’re trying to curb the stress, anxiety, and tension in your life, then this diet is worth a try. It may be difficult to start this diet initially, but as you begin the diet it will soon become routine and you will no longer have to keep an eye on your watch. This diet is highly recommended and if you stick to it inshallah you will see a different in your PMS symptoms. It doesn’t hurt to try and the only money it will cost is the change in your shopping habits.

Lastly, keep in mind that Allah has created a cure for every disease except death and old age, so with the help of Allah, you can be cured but you must be patient and try to find the remedies out there, and when one is pointed out to you don’t procrastinate, especially if it doesn’t cost any money.

With Allah, comes all success

Pregnancy Related Mood Swings

The time of pregnancy can be a mood altering change for many women. While most of this is linked to the rapid change in hormones.
Prevalence of depression during pregnancy varies between 4 and 7.6 percent. The incidence of prenatal depression seems to be increased in the first trimester, suggesting that this is a time of maximum vulnerability to depression. However, depressive symptoms is estimated to occur in 8 to 38 percent of pregnant women.

It is common to get "the blues" from time to time. Sadness is a normal part of life. Pregnancy has been depicted in the media as a time when women bloom and get rosy complexions. This rosy picture is often far from the truth. Pregnancy is a life-altering event and a prelude to one of life's largest and most intense undertakings. Women can be overwhelmed with the spectrum of physical changes taking place and the psychological adaptation necessary to accommodate pending lifestyle changes.
Women need extra support from spouses, friends and family during pregnancy, as well as several months postpartum. If there are other coincidental issues such as financial instability or marital or family discord, job dissatisfaction or maternal or family health concerns, this "pile-up" of stressors can induce a chronic state of sadness and hopelessness known as clinical depression.

It is common for a woman's mood to change quickly in pregnancy. These mood swings may be caused by hormone changes or thoughts about new responsibilities of motherhood. Perhaps the worst thing about mood swings is that they are unpredictable. A minor problem may not bother you one day and may have you in tears the next. Not knowing how you will react to a situation makes it hard on you, your family, and your friends. These changes are not something you can always control, so do not blame yourself if you are often teary or short tempered. The hormones that are needed to support your pregnancy form a complex system. Levels of some hormones are rising, while levels of others are falling. These changes are needed to bring about all the different stages of your pregnancy. When hormones control so many functions in the body, it makes sense that these constantly changing levels will affect you. Although pregnancy is supposed to be a happy time, for some woman it can be a trying and stressful time.

As Muslims, Islam has placed great importance to bringing up and correctly educating children, and this should begin before the creation of the child.

Before marital relations, a supplication has been provided by the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) which is to protect the potential child from the whispers of shaytaan. The supplication in English is: "In the name of Allah. O Allah protect us from satan and protect whatever You bestow us with from satan." If it is decreed that the couple are to have a child then satan will never be able to harm it.

The pregnant women is supposed to give importance to preserving her own health, since in her health and bodily well being lies the well-being of the child in her womb. The pregnant women is freed from the obligation to fast during the month of Ramadan if it will cause harm to the fetus. She is instructed to fast later or to give food to the poor instead. This is found in the hadith: Allah has remitted half the prayer to the traveller, and fasting to the traveller, the woman breast-feeding and the pregnant. (Reported by Abu Daawood (E.T. 2/660/2402), al-tirmidhee and an-Nasaaee. Shaikh al-Albaanee said in 'al -Mishkaat 'its chain of narration is good.'

Wishing for Death

Narrated Anas bin Malik, The Prophet (salalahu walayhe wa salam) said, "None of you should wish for death because of a calamity befalling him; but if he has to wish for death, he should say: "O Allah! Keep me alive as long as life is better for me, and let me die if death is better for me.' " Vol 7, number 575 Bukhari

This hadith has been a part of my life when times are hard and I need some understanding. Sometimes it seems as if death may indeed be better for us when the trials are hard but we still must continue to strive hard in Allah's cause and remember that Verily With Every Difficulty There is Ease.

And when the help of Allah comes....

And Allah doesn't put a burden on us greater than we have the strength to bear..surah baqarah.

Psychological conditions may allow a wife to prevent her husband

Question: Is a woman sinful if she prevents her husband when he desires her for sexual intercourse due to her psychological state or due to an illness that is hurting her?

Response: It is obligatory upon the wife to respond to her husband if he calls her to his bed. However, if she is psychologically ill and is not able to actively respond to his call or if she has a physical illness, then in such cases it is not allowed for the husband to call upon her. This is because the Prophet (sal-Allaahu `alayhe wa sallam) said:

((There is to be no harm done or reciprocation of harm)).

He should either refrain or enjoy her company in such a way that does not harm her.

Shaykh Ibn 'Uthaymeen

Taken from www.fatwa-online.com

advice on dealing with anger

Advice On Dealing With Anger

Anger is one of the evil whispers of Shaytaan, which leads to so many evils and tragedies, of which only Allaah knows their full extent. For this reason Islam has a great deal to say about this bad characteristic, and the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) described cures for this "disease" and ways to limit its effects, among which are the following:

(1) Seeking refuge with Allaah from the Shaytaan:

Sulayman ibn Sard said: "I was sitting with the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), and two men were slandering one another. One of them was red in the face, and the veins on his neck were standing out. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, 'I know a word which, if he were to say it, what he feels would go away. If he said "I seek refuge with Allaah from the Shaytaan," what he feels (i.e., his anger) would go away.'" (Reported by al-Bukhaari, al-Fath, 6/337)

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "If a man gets angry and says, 'I seek refuge with Allaah,' his anger will go away." (Saheeh al-Jaami' al-Sagheer, no. 695)

(2) Keeping silent:

The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "If any of you becomes angry, let him keep silent." (Reported by Imaam Ahmad, al-Musnad, 1/329; see also Saheeh al-Jaami', 693, 4027).

This is because in most cases, the angry person loses self control and could utter words of kufr (from which we seek refuge with Allaah), or curses, or the word of divorce (talaaq) which would destroy his home, or words of slander which would bring him the enmity and hatred of others. So, in short, keeping silent is the solution which helps one to avoid all that.

(3) Not moving:

The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "If any of you becomes angry and he is standing, let him sit down, so his anger will go away; if it does not go away, let him lie down."

The narrator of this hadeeth is Abu Dharr (may Allaah be pleased with him), and there is a story connected to his telling of it: he was taking his camels to drink at a trough that he owned, when some other people came along and said (to one another), "Who can compete with Abu Dharr (in bringing animals to drink) and make his hair stand on end?" A man said, "I can," so he brought his animals and competed with Abu Dharr, with the result that the trough was broken. [i.e., Abu Dharr was expecting help in watering his camels, but instead the man misbehaved and caused the trough to be broken]. Abu Dharr was standing, so he sat down, then he laid down. Someone asked him, "O Abu Dharr, why did you sit down then lie down?" He said: "The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: . . ." and quoted the hadeeth. (The hadeeth and this story may be found in Musnad Ahmad, 5/152; see also Saheeh al-Jaami', no. 694).

According to another report, Abu Dharr was watering his animals at the trough, when another man made him angry, so he sat down . . . (Fayd al-Qadeer, al-Manaawi, 1/408)

Among the benefits of this advice given by the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) is the fact that it prevents the angry person from going out of control, because he could strike out and injure someone, or even kill - as we will find out shortly - or he could destroy possessions and so on. Sitting down makes it less likely that he will become overexcited, and lying down makes it even less likely that he will do something crazy or harmful. Al-'Allaamah al-Khattaabi, may Allaah have mercy on him, said in his commentary on Abu Dawud: "One who is standing is in a position to strike and destroy, while the one who is sitting is less likely to do that, and the one who is lying down can do neither. It is possible that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) told the angry person to sit down or lie down so that he would not do something that he would later regret. And Allaah knows best." (Sunan Abi Dawud, with Ma'aalim al-Sunan, 5/141)

(4) Following the advice of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him):

Abu Hurayrah, may Allaah be pleased with him, reported that a man said to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), "Advise me." He said, "Do not become angry." The man repeated his request several times, and each time the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) told him, "Do not become angry." (Reported by al-Bukhaari, Fath al-Bari, 10/456)

According to another report, the man said: "I thought about what the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, and I realized that anger combines all kinds of evil." (Musnad Ahmad, 5/373)

(5) Do not become angry and Paradise will be yours (a saheeh hadeeth, see Saheeh al-Jaami', 7374. Ibn Hajr attributed it to al-Tabaraani, see al-Fath 4/465):

Remembering what Allaah has promised to the righteous (muttaqeen) who keep away from the causes of anger and struggle within themselves to control it, is one of the most effective ways of extinguishing the flames of anger. One of the ahaadeeth that describe the great reward for doing this is: "Whoever controls his anger at the time when he has the means to act upon it, Allaah will fill his heart with contentment on the Day of Resurrection." (Reported by al-Tabaraani, 12/453, see also Saheeh al-Jaami', 6518).

Another great reward is described in the Prophet's words: "Whoever controls his anger at the time when he has the means to act upon it, Allaah will call him before all of mankind on the Day of Resurrection, and will let him choose of the Hoor al-'Iyn whoever he wants." (Reported by Abu Dawud, 4777, and others. It is classified as hasan in Saheeh al-Jaami, 6518).

(6) Knowing the high status and advantages offered to those who control themselves:

The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "The strong man is not the one who can overpower others (in wrestling); rather, the strong man is the one who controls himself when he gets angry." (Reported by Ahmad, 2/236; the hadeeth is agreed upon). The greater the anger, the higher the status of the one who controls himself. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "The strongest man is the one who, when he gets angry and his face reddens and his hackles rise, is able to defeat his anger." (Reported by Imaam Ahmad, 5/367, and classified as hasan in Saheeh al-Jaami', 3859)

Anas reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) passed by some people who were wrestling. He asked, "What is this?" They said: "So-and-so is the strongest, he can beat anybody." The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, "Shall I not tell you who is even stronger then him? The man who, when he is mistreated by another, controls his anger, has defeated his own shaytaan and the shaytaan of the one who made him angry." (Reported by al-Bazzaar, and Ibn Hajr said its isnaad is saheeh. Al-Fath, 10/519)

(7) Following the Prophet's example in the case of anger:

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) is our leader and has set the highest example in this matter, as is recorded in a number of ahaadeeth. One of the most famous was reported by Anas, may Allaah be pleased with him, who said: "I was walking with the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), and he was wearing a Najraani cloak with a rough collar. A Bedouin came and seized him roughly by the edge of his cloak, and I saw the marks left on his neck by the collar. Then the Bedouin ordered him to give him some of the wealth of Allaah that he had. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) turned to him and smiled, then ordered that he should be given something." (Agreed upon. Fath al-Baari, 10/375)

Another way in which we can follow the example of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) is by making our anger for the sake of Allaah, when His rights are violated. This is the kind of anger which is praiseworthy. So the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) became angry when he was told about the imaam who was putting people off the prayer by making it too long; when he saw a curtain with pictures of animate creatures in 'Aa'ishah's house; when Usaamah spoke to him about the Makhzoomi woman who had been convicted of theft, and he said "Do you seek to intervene concerning one of the punishments prescribed by Allaah?"; when he was asked questions that he disliked, and so on. His anger was purely for the sake of Allaah.

(8) Knowing that resisting anger is one of the signs of righteousness (taqwaa):

The righteous (al-muttaqoon) are those praised by Allaah in the Qur'aan and by His Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). Paradise as wide as heaven and earth has been prepared for them. One of their characteristics is that they (interpretation of the meaning) "spend (in Allaah's Cause) in prosperity and in adversity, [they] repress anger, and [they] pardon men; verily, Allaah loves al-muhsinoon (the good-doers)." [Aal 'Imraan 3:134]

These are the ones whose good character and beautiful attributes and deeds Allaah has mentioned, and whom people admire and want to emulate. One of their characteristics is that (interpretation of the meaning) ". . . when they are angry, they forgive." [al-Shooraa 42:47]

(9) Listening to reminders:

Anger is a part of human nature, and people vary in their anger. It may be difficult for a man not to get angry, but sincere people will remember Allaah when they are reminded, and they will not overstep the mark. Some examples follow:

Ibn 'Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with him) reported that a man sought permission to speak to 'Umar ibn al-Khattaab (may Allaah be pleased with him), then he said: "O son of al-Khattaab, you are not giving us much and you are not judging fairly between us." 'Umar (may Allaah be pleased with him) was so angry that he was about to attack the man, but al-Hurr ibn Qays, who was one of those present, said: "O Ameer al-Mu'mineen, Allaah said to His Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) (interpretation of the meaning): 'Show forgiveness, enjoin what is good, and turn away from the foolish' [al-A'raaf 7:199]. This man is one of the foolish." By Allaah, 'Umar could go no further after al-Hurr had recited this aayah to him, and he a man who was careful to adhere to the Book of Allaah. (Reported by al-Bukhaari, al-Fath, 4/304).

This is how the Muslim should be. The evil munaafiq (hypocrite) was not like this when he was told the hadeeth of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and one of the Companions said to him, "Seek refuge with Allaah from the Shaytaan." He said to the one who reminded him, "Do you think I am crazy? Go away!" (Reported by al-Bukhaari, al-Fath, 1/465). We seek refuge with Allaah from failure.

(10) Knowing the bad effects of anger:

The negative effects of anger are many; in short they cause damage to one's own self and to others. The angry person may utter words of slander and obscenity, he may attack others (physically) in an uncontrolled manner, even to the point of killing. The following story contains a valuable lesson:

'Ilqimah ibn Waa'il reported that his father (may Allaah be pleased with him) told him: "I was sitting with the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) when a man came to him leading another man by a rope. He said, 'O Messenger of Allaah, this man killed my brother.' The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) asked him, 'Did you kill him?' He said, 'Yes, I killed him.' He asked, 'How did you kill him?' He said, 'He and I were hitting a tree to make the leaves fall, for animal feed, and he slandered me, so I struck him on the side of the head with an axe, and killed him.' . . ." (Reported by Muslim, 1307, edited by al-Baaqi).

Anger could lead to less than killing, such as wounding and breaking bones. If the one who caused the anger runs away, the angry person turns his anger in on himself, so he may tear his clothes, or strike his cheeks, or have a fit, or fall unconscious, or he may break dishes and plates, or break furniture.

In the worst cases, anger results in social disasters and the breaking of family ties, i.e., divorce. Ask many of those who divorced their wives, and they will tell you: it was in a moment of anger. This divorce results in misery for the children, regret and frustration, a hard and difficult life, all as a result of anger. If they had remembered Allaah, come to their senses, restrained their anger and sought refuge with Allaah, none of this would have happened. Going against the sharee'ah only results in loss.

The damage to health that results from anger can only be described by doctors, such as thrombosis, high blood pressure, tachycardia (abnormally rapid heartbeat) and hyperventilation (rapid, shallow breathing), which can lead to fatal heart attacks, diabetes, etc. We ask Allaah for good health.

(11) The angry person should think about himself during moments of anger:

If the angry person could see himself in the mirror when he is angry, he would hate himself and the way he looks. If he could see the way he changes, and the way his body and limbs shake, how his eyes glare and how out of control and crazy his behaviour is, he would despise himself and be revolted by his own appearance. It is well-known that inner ugliness is even worse than outer ugliness; how happy the Shaytaan must be when a person is in this state! We seek refuge with Allaah from the Shaytaan and from failure.

(12) Du'aa':

Du'aa' is always the weapon of the believer, whereby he asks Allaah to protect him from evil, trouble and bad behaviour and seeks refuge with Him from falling into the pit of kufr or wrongdoing because of anger. One of the three things that can help save him is: being fair at times of contentment and of anger (Saheeh al-Jaami', 3039). One of the du'aa's of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) was:

"O Allaah, by Your knowledge of the Unseen and Your power over Your creation, keep me alive for as long as You know life is good for me, and cause me to die when You know death is good for me. O Allaah, I ask You to make me fear You in secret and in public, and I ask You to make me speak the truth in times of contentment and of anger. I ask You not to let me be extravagant in poverty or in prosperity. I ask You for continuous blessings, and for contentment that does not end. I ask You to let me accept Your decree, and for a good life after death. I ask You for the joy of seeing Your face and for the longing to meet You, without going through diseases and misguiding fitnah (trials). O Allaah, adorn us with the adornment of faith and make us among those who are guided. Praise be to Allaah, the Lord of the Worlds."